TAX agent Harold Crick (Ferrell) is hearing voices in his head.
MIXING fairytale fantasy with the realism of fascism in post-war Spain sounds an illconceived, if not impossible, idea.
A convicted child molester who snatched a six-year-old girl as she played in her bath has been jailed for life.
A TEENAGER was jailed for 12 months today after strangling a girl as they had sex in an arts centre's toilets.
FIFTEEN pigeons were killed in a blaze on Teesside.
FROM the makers of Shrek and Wallace & Gromit" reads the blurb on the poster - and that's a pretty good recommendation. Instead of fiddling about with Plasticine figures, Aardman have gone computerised.
A predatory paedophile who snatched a six-year-old from her bath and raped her will hear his sentence today.
BORO fans who ignore a smoking ban will be ejected from the ground - and could face a 12-month match ban.
I HAVE often said that in gardening, sometimes ignorance can be bliss.
Jack Hatfield Sports Teesside League, Division One: BEADS FC 3 Thornaby Ath 4.
Darlington Sunday Invitation League; Division One : Smith and Allan and East End replayed their Division One Cup quarter-final last Sunday, and it was Smith and Allan who deservedly came out on top triumphing by 6-3 and earned the right to meet Spraire RA in the semi-final.
SPRAIRE Lads Under-9s took on third-placed Aycliffe SC B at their Hummersknott School base, in Darlington, and both teams came away with a point apiece as it ended 1-1.
The admirable Steven Chaytor has written a new book, his third, 16 ruddy-cheeked accounts of watching North-East sport in the raw - for raw, read absolutely perishing - as opposed, snug and smug, to on television.
Northern League chairman Mike Amos has angrily rounded on the Football Association, saying they have gone back on their word over the extended UniBond First Division.
Darlington 21st Allstars: THE Under-14s Colts, sponsored by Ultimate Windows & Conservatories, struggled to cope with a physical Greatham side who would have had more than a one-goal half-time lead had it not been for brave saves from Curtis Simpson.
Seaham R.F.C. 5 , Bishop Auckland R.U.F.C. 58
MASONS ARMS maintained their 100 per-cent record with a thumping win over title rivals Thorns.
Record-breaking long-distance runner Sharon Gayter was last night named as our Local Hero of 2006. Earlier this year she ran from Lands End to John O'Groats, slicing 18 hours off the previous record time, and the achievement was recognised at the Local Heroes Awards at Hardwick Hall Hotel near Sedgefield in County Durham.
Having a personal trainer at the gym used to be the exclusive preserve of the rich and famous, but now the NHS is deploying health trainers across the region to help ordinary people turn the health around. Health Editor Barry Nelson investigates how the scheme is working.
Churchill's Girl (C4); Coast (BBC2): PAMELA Digby did her bit for the war effort working at the foreign office where - and this is what made the job so attractive - she was "surrounded by eye-catching men in uniform".
Christmas shopping with a clear conscience has been made easier thanks to a new venture which puts a wide range of ethical goods within easy rach.
A VILLAGE school is celebrating a £240,000 four-year development.
POLICE have described a clampdown on crime and anti-social behaviour in a town as a success.
CHECKS by safety specialists have discovered that one in seven cars on the forecourts of some second-hand car dealers in the county were unroadworthy.
RESIDENTS have packed a public meeting to voice their anger at a proposed quarry.
NORTH Yorkshire Police have hit back at claims employees have been speeding through the village where their headquarters is.
SEVEN volunteers who have spent a total of 80 years caring for the Yorkshire Dales National Park have been honoured.
A LOCAL radio station broadcasting over the internet may soon record North Yorkshire County Council meetings.
A THIEF who stole a pensioner's Christmas money is being hunted by police.
THE Bunny Burrows animal rescue home, in Richmond, will hold a fundraising event in Northallerton town hall from 9am to 4pm tomorrow.
The news that Chancellor Gordon Brown's four-month-old son, Fraser, has cystic fibrosis has raised the profile of this little-known disease. Health Editor Barry Nelson investigates.
GCSE and A-level art students are to learn from a textile and fashion designer.
DURHAM MP Roberta Blackman-Woods wants to hear from constituents who lost money with the collapse of the hamper and savings firm Farepak.
SLAVE TRADE: TONY Blair has said that he feels "deep sorrow" for Britain's role in the African slave trade, but will not give a full apology, as some have demanded.
SPORT is an important element of North-East culture. We are a sporting region and our passions run high.
KIND-HEARTED youngsters walked the length of Hadrian's Wall and helped raise £16,000 for charity.
SANTA Claus will be touring Durham in a car-drawn sleigh thanks to the efforts of local Rotarians.
A NIGHTSPOT is offering drivers who do not drink a free night out.
THE first pieces of equipment have been lowered into place as part of a £450,000 park redevelopment.
A NEW air ambulance will soon take to the skies thanks to the generosity of fans of Top Gear presenter Richard Hammond.
A KICKBOXING competition is being held at a north Durham theatre over the weekend.
THE first Tees Valley Photography Festival came to a close with the announcement of the winner of the portrait competition.
Residents in Stockton have got the UK's biggest battery recycling trials off to a flying start, collecting 57,000 old, unwanted or used batteries in only six months.
CHILDREN are at the forefront of a campaign to discourage adults smoking in a town's parks and play areas.
BLIND and partially-sighted children on Teesside are to be given a sporting chance.
POLICE will today launch their annual Christmas and new year drink-drive campaign amid fears that their message to motorists is failing to get across.
Not many people are compared to a saint and a Roman Emperor in the same breath, but that was the fate that befell the late Joe Walton recently.
A CAMPAIGN is launched today across Wear Valley and Teesdale to raise awareness about sexual health among young people this Christmas.
A MONKEY has left the jungle behind this week to tour County Durham schools, spreading a message about the benefits of eating a healthy diet.
Guisborough library is hosting two Christmas-themed evenings in its meeting room, organised by Guisborough Theatre Club, on Friday and Saturday, December 8 and 9.