IT is not quite as ludicrous as his suggestion that female footballers should wear tighter shorts, but FIFA president Sepp Blatter's proposal for reducing the number of overseas players in the English game invites just as much ridicule.

The horse hasn't so much bolted as disappeared over the horizon without anyone giving chase, yet Blatter is still talking about a panicked attempt to shut the stable door.

Having come to the conclusion that the Premier League boasts too many non-English players about ten years after supporters in this country started saying exactly the same thing, Blatter has come up with a cunning plan.

It is called the "Six-plusfive- plan" and involves teams fielding a minimum of six domestic footballers and a maximum of five foreign players. And like the cunning plans devised by Baldrick in Blackadder, it is doomed to fail spectacularly.

It is not so much the sentiment of Blatter's proposals that is ill-advised - nobody can dispute that the England national team has suffered because of the lack of homegrown talent currently performing in the Premier League - it is more his pig-headed refusal to acknowledge either the law of the land or reality.

European law guarantees the freedom of movement of workers, so rather than proposing a binding ruling, Blatter is proposing a "gentleman's agreement" with the continent's national associations.

It will not work, firstly because the European Union's executive commission has warned of multimillion pound court cases if the agreement was to be challenged in court, and also because turkeys will not vote for Christmas.

Neither the FA nor the Premier League want to do anything that might detract from the current popularity and marketability of English football. They've asked themselves whether foreign television viewers would rather watch a Liverpool side containing Fernando Torres or Peter Crouch, and quickly done the maths.

UEFA boss Michel Platini has come up with a slightly more sensible compromise, whereby a quota of locallytrained players could be imposed without any reference to nationality.

Therefore, an 18-year-old Ghanaian who had spent three years in Arsenal's Academy would be treated the same as an identicallyaged teenager from Streatham.

The plan is much more workable in terms of the law, but would achieve precious little. The top clubs would simply expand their Academies to stockpile hundreds of talented overseas youngsters. In terms of improving the national side, it would not take long for the England manager to find himself in a worse position than he inhabits at the minute.

The reality of the situation is that it is impossible to turn back the clock.

Much as we would like a world where Arsenal win the Champions League with 11 Englishmen and the nearest Manchester United come to a foreign striker is a wily schemer from Scotland, it is not going to happen.

English football has built its success on the back of its overseas talent. As a result, it is far too late to start complaining about it now.

THE Premier League will have one less foreign manager, for a day or two at least, when Sven-Goran Eriksson departs as Manchester City boss next month.

It is hard to feel too sorry for the Swede as he prepares to pocket his second multi-million pound pay-off in the space of two years, but it is ludicrous that he is losing his job despite guaranteeing City a top-ten finish.

Thaksin Shinawatra has displayed a breathtaking ignorance of how English football works, and if he is to remove every manager that fails to secure a Champions League place, he will be needing every last baht of the assets that remain under the control of the Thai government.

Shinawatra is due to stand trial on corruption charges later this year. In the eyes of his accusors, Eriksson is fortunate to be leaving with anything at all. As far as they are concerned, it is usually the City chairman that is the one being paid off.

STOKE CITY, who are favourites to claim the second automatic promotion place to the Premier League on Sunday, currently boast seven loan players. Hull City, who are the only team that can stop them, are making do with four. Little wonder then that both are already being described as next year's Derby County.

If Stoke do make it to the top-flight, they will have to sign half a new team just to replace the players that will be disappearing off to their parent club at the end of the current campaign.

Hull have no chance of signing Manchester United striker Frazier Campbell this summer, so they will have to shell out millions of pounds to replace the 15 goals the youngster has contributed to their promotion push.

Neither club would have achieved promotion had they had to rely on their own players alone. Surely it is wrong that an ability to exploit the loan market is sufficient to secure promotion to the Premier League.

PERFECTION is almost impossible to achieve in any sport, yet Ronnie O'Sullivan continues to trot out 147s with a staggering regularity.

The Rocket is not without his faults, yet his skill around a snooker table renders most of any criticism irrelevant.

Supremely talented yet steadfastly insolent, he is a worthy successor to Alex Higgins' crown.