When it comes to advice I believe in quality rather than quantity.

There are a relatively small number of people whose judgement I trust implicitly. To them I return time and again for counsel. I'm sure they're always glad to see me!

One of them is a successful businessman. I'll share with you what he told me this week about the qualities he wants in his staff. An excellent workforce is, of course, the bedrock of business success. He looks for people who are competent, committed and who show they care.

The first two qualities won't surprise anyone. Efficiency and hard work are essential in any venture. But it was strange, initially, to hear him place equal emphasis on caring qualities as a key to success in what is, after all, a cut-throat commercial environment.

He was right of course - he usually is. Someone who cares will be a team player, go the extra mile for a colleague or customer. I also believe that the rules for a successful society are similar to those for a successful business - caring is an essential element.

Now this may sound strange for someone who has expressed robust views on a range of subjects, but I am worried that we are becoming a less caring society.

One of my most abiding and ugly memories is of being in a street in London when someone collapsed. He was stepped over, avoided and ignored by scores of passers-by before someone went to help.

I was reminded of this incident the other week, when I was with an elderly relative in a restaurant and they suffered a choking fit. As I and other family members tried frantically - and finally successfully - to help them, staff and diners sat by continuing their meals and conversations. What was a matter of life and death to us was a passing inconvenience to them.

Now, I know most of you will be able to quote incidents in which you've seen people behaving much differently, much better than this, where they've gone out of their way to be kind, patient and considerate.

But I wonder if any of us could deny that society has developed a harder shell. Just this week, we've had two genuine tragedies - the fatal stabbing of a police officer and a woman shot dead by police. Yet, as I look in my newspaper, they receive less prominence than the story of a judge who didn't expose himself on a train. I doubt whether either will attain the column inches devoted to the latest ladies' fashions at Ascot next week, or, heaven help us, the latest idiocy or eviction from Big Brother.

This week, too, sees the 25th anniversary of the successful ending of the Falklands conflict. Can you recall - as I do - the genuine horror with which we viewed images and read news of deaths from that action? Compare it to the dull resignation with which most people now greet the death toll from Iraq.

As a society we have to do more to reward and encourage caring. We also have to learn to differentiate between issues of genuine concern, which should engage us emotionally and intellectually and the thousand and one media-led outbursts of moral outrage and panic that divert us daily.

That would lead to a more compassionate society and a more successful society.

Because, as my friend the businessman proves, nice guys do sometimes come first.