LAST Christmas was a time Howard Etherington was dreading.

Howard, now 66, lost his beloved wife Grace in September 2004 - just two days before the couple's 38th wedding anniversary.

The rest of the world was preparing to celebrate the festive season, buying presents, decorating houses, singing carols, but for Howard, the pain of his loss was still raw.

He said: "It was not a time I was looking forward to at all. It was shortly after my wife had passed away and it was in contrast to all the Christmases we had known together.

"We are talking about a lady who wasn't just my wife, she was literally a soulmate for 40 years."

Howard was invited to join last year's Light Up A Life service at St Cuthbert's and at first was not sure what to expect - but found the entire experience uplifting.

"It was a pleasure to be part of it," he said.

"The first candle was lit against a darkened background and then a host of lights appeared.

"It was a joyous celebration and I came away from it much lifted, quite frankly, it was one of the things which has stayed with me.

"As a person getting over a very deep loss, it allowed me to think you do have it within you to move on.

"You can share the experience, not with people who sympathise, but with people who know exactly what you are going through.

"You have all walked down that dark road and emerged.

"The joy comes in remembering what you had."