Newcastle United are often in need of divine inspiration, and, thanks to a Magpies-mad vicar, they might just get it.

The Reverend Glyn Evans is hoping that God will turn out for the Toon Army after penning alternative hymn lyrics that sing the praises of Geordie messiahs Alan Shearer and Bobby Robson.

In the best spirit of Monty Python's Blessed are the Cheese-makers sketch, Mr Evans has turned Shine Jesus Shine into Score Shearer Score, and To God be the Glory into To Bob be the Glory.

But, unlike like the Python team in the 1970s, he hopes that his lyrics will not offend church traditionalists.

Mr Evans, 42, city centre chaplain at St Andrew's Church, Newgate Street, Newcastle, said yesterday: "I'm sure some people will object and say it's offensive, but it's not meant to be.

"Our bishop is a football fan, although he supports Bradford City."

He thinks the Toon worship could become a regular feature.

He said: "We might get a few more people coming in once we start.

"It seems appropriate because St James' Park is in our parish, so we're really Newcastle United's church.

"I'm sure they can hear them singing in Heaven when they sing there, because it's one of the loudest football grounds.

"Hopefully, we can recreate that in the church."

Other soccer songs will include Onwards Bobby's Soldiers Marching off to Play, as opposed to Onward Christian Soldiers.

His lyric-tampering is not the only Toon trick up his cassock.

Mr Evans dubs his black robe and white dog collar his Toon replica kit and named his son Jack Ossie, after former Magpie boss Ossie Ardiles.