With many historic events in Iraq, last week was full of ups and downs for Catterick Army wife Hayley Kimsey, whose husband, Russ, is serving with the Queen's Dragoon Guards. In the second extract from her diary, she recalls her emotions

SATURDAY, APRIL 5: Today was for the kids. My neighbour and I, with all our six children in tow, went bowling then for something to eat and then to the funfair. It was to give the kids a little bit of fun and to take their minds off not having dad around.

They had a fantastic time and really came out of themselves. We met another friend and her husband there; he was a great hit with the children as he was turned into a substitute dad for the night.

My three-year-old, Charis, couldn't leave him alone, climbing on his shoulders and talking to him about her dad. On the way back from the funfair, she was holding his hand and said: "I wish my daddy would come home but he's had to go to Star Wars to fight bad men." Everyone had a lump in their throat when she said that.

SUNDAY, APRIL 6: I felt a sense of relief when I heard US troops are in Baghdad. But then I heard three British soldiers have been killed in Basra. They didn't name them, but I couldn't help but panic, my heart pounding. Could one of them be my Russ or the husband of one of my friends? I felt sick, but could only wait. I know, if something happened to Russ I would be the first to know, but the panic is always there when you hear of any British casualties.

I thought of Russ a lot today as Sunday is always a great family day for us. We like to do something with the kids if the weather is good and then cook dinner together. Now, Sundays always seem to be a "down" day.

MONDAY, APRIL 7: Baby Teya sent her first letter to her daddy today. We had great fun with paints. I put her hand and foot in a saucer of blue paint and then put her prints on to a Bluey (air mail letter). They came out quite well, considering, although we got most of the paint on each other and the floor.

I then included a little message from Teya, saying how much she weighs now and what she can do. I also cut a bit of her hair and stuck it to the letter as it has started to change colour since he left.

I also got an update from the families' office today, who said our boys are fine.

TUESDAY, APRIL 8: It was Jessica's parents' evening today and her teacher told me she is doing really well and coming on in leaps and bounds. She was the one who seemed to be most affected by her dad leaving, and spent a few nights crying.

But now she seems to be coping very well, has had no problems at school and seems quite happy and contented although, deep down, I know she still really misses him and wants him back.

She has been a great help since Russ left and seems to have grown up a lot, helping me with the other three children. I still haven't received a letter from Russ yet.

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 9: The postman must have read my mind; I got a letter. I was ecstatic - at last, after a month of not hearing anything, the long-awaited letter had arrived. Russ says he is fine, although a little sunburnt, and told me not to worry.

He says he really misses his home comforts and asked if I could I send him anything to eat.

I was so relieved to have finally heard from him; I was on Cloud Nine all day. He also mentioned a friend had only received one letter since he had been out there. I put a food parcel together for Russ and another for his mate. It was a good day and I feel so much better. The US are in Baghdad. Hopefully things will be over soon.

The third extract from Hayley's diary will appear next week.

14/04/2003