Reality Check (C4); WestEnders (Tyne Tees)

"You might say the lunatics have taken over the asylum," concluded Kate Marlow, acting coach with a difference as the tension grew in Mowgli hairdressing salon in London's Primrose Hill.

Hairdressers might seem an overexposed profession on TV at present, in both fictionional (BBC1's Cutting It) and factual (C4's The Salon) programmes. But this latest addition to the reality roster found a new twist with owners at loggerheads. The problem was not that they don't own rival salons but the same one.

Tony and Daniel - together with Adrienne Simpson, whose role seemed to be piggy in the middle - went into business together two years ago. They're opposites and, in this case, don't attract but create tension. With the salon's first fashion show just six weeks ago, performance coach Marlow was sent into this "battleground of clashings ego and power struggles". The result was a cross between radio shrink show In The Psychiatrist's Chair and fly-on-the-hairdryer series The Salon.

Kate began by noting that the "quite stroppy bunch" of assistants were running rings around the bosses - hence the lunatics taking over the asylum quote. Where family man Tony favoured a conciliatory approach, bachelor Daniel opted for confrontation. Neither was willing to give an inch, despite Marlow pointing out that, if they didn't stop competing against each other, their business was going to suffer.

She recruited actors to enact a scene as Tony and Daniel so the offenders could see how they behaved for themselves. Daniel's forthright approach was as damaging as Tony's more reserved attitude, she pointed out. The pair did agree on one thing - their relationship was like marriage without the sex, thus robbing them of the chance to kiss and make up.

Marlow's therapy didn't seem to help, especially when Tony suddenly brought in wife Cindy to organise the fashion show. So Daniel asked his friend to help. Marlow's response was to get everybody doing some stage fighting. This was all about "the illusion of violence, not the reality" although you worried that Tony and Daniel's tussle would turn into something bloody.

All this went on for weeks. Marlow herself referred to a three-hour session of which we saw a few minutes, so I felt a bit robbed when she came up with a pat solution. It was all to do with their attitude to women, something to do with "becoming your mother's husband instead of your mother's son". At which point, I made my excuses and left.

Real life was calmer in WestEnders, the reality series about people living in Newcastle's West End. Dave relieved his stress by juggling toy frogs for an hour each day. Perhaps Tony and Daniel could consider juggling hair brushes to calm themselves.

Anyone who hears Leanne sing needs help. The phrase "strangled cat" comes to mind. Unfortunately, she's determined to make a living out of not being able to sing. The viewers of RI:SE (all three of them) showed good sense by not encouraging her ambition and voting someone else the worse singer in the country.

I fear that even tough-talking Kate Marlow wouldn't be able to coach Leanne into singing any better.

Published: 04/06/2003