The mystical stork must be limbering up for a busy six months with three visits planned to my group of close-knit friends before the end of the year.

Up until very recently, we have managed to avoid the patter of tiny feet, apart from an old school friend who has since moved down South I haven't had to cope with impending motherhood - until now.

Having three close friends all ready to give birth is quite a pressure - especially for a single girl who has barely grasped the responsibilities of looking after herself never mind caring for a new bundle of joy.

Of course it is a happy time - I am delighted that soon I will be stepping into the role of (obviously) favourite Aunt three times over - but the whole process has also taken its toll on us all.

Until recently we were a group of party animals - never happier than when we had a vodka in one hand and a kebab in the other. But now planning a night out will become like a military operation.

No more spontaneous drunken Saturday nights with our only worries being keeping our lipstick in place and our tights ladder-free.

Instead we will have to get an army of baby-sitters in place before we can venture to somewhere quiet so all the new mums can hear their mobile phones if there is a crisis in the nursery.

Already conversations about sexy men and the latest fashions are being replaced with talk of stretch marks and the benefits of disposable nappies.

Shopping trips will become like a Krypton Factor challenge as we try to force three prams and their screaming charges into a tiny changing room only to find out that the High Street doesn't cater for mothers under-50 who want to look good despite their post-baby lumps and bumps.

But the most worrying thing about the forthcoming stampede of tiny feet is that soon all my other friends will be following suit and reaching for a comfortable pair of elasticated trousers.

Then if I don't want to drown in a sea of breast pumps and rusks I will have no choice but to join the new mothers club myself - now that REALLY is a frightening thought.

Published: 19/06/2003