The dole queue beckons one Weatherfield resident as Karen McDonald is given her marching orders from Underworld knicker factory in Coronation Street (ITV1).

Why she's surprised to be sacked by owner Mike Baldwin is beyond me. As bad girls go, she's travelled further than most.

Her reward for confessing all to Mike - namely, that she and lover Joe of the six o'clock shadow were swindling him out of his money and his business - is the boot. Good for Baldwin. There are far too many murderers, blackmailers and other criminals getting away with it in Soapland. What did she expect, a wage rise? Instead, she gets her cards and earns the hostility of workmates whose jobs she nearly lost them.

There's only one thing for her to do, pack her bags and leave Weatherfield.

No sooner has she turned the corner and vanished from sight, than Tracy the terrible is sinking her claws into Karen's estranged husband Steve. She offers a shoulder for him to cry on, although his attention (and his hands) wander further down her body. We know from the past that in a time of marital crisis, Steve heads for the nearest woman to console himself. Tracy can carve another notch in her bedpost.

Gail the hamster is horrified when she sees the hovel into which daughter Sarah the schoolgirl mum and boyfriend Todd the brainy boy have moved. Gail is used to clean straw on the floor at the very least, and threatens to fight for custody of baby Bethany. Surely no court in the land would hand over a child to a woman who failed to notice she was married to a serial killer?

Gail's ex, Martin Platt, has been driven out of his home by cockroaches and taken refuge in the Nelsons' home. Personally, I'd prefer the cockroaches, but for Martin the attraction is sleeping under the same roof as young Katy Nelson. When they're left alone for the evening, a night of passion would seem to be on the cards. They've been toying with each other for weeks, but not half as long as Alfie Moon and Kat Slater in EastEnders (BBC1). After months of simmering passion beneath the optics in the Queen Vic, Alfie finally pulls more than a pint.

Kat has shown admirable restraint in not falling for Alfie's cheeky chappie attitude. Kat and her kit usually part company soon after the "Hello, my name's so-and-so" introductions.

At long last, she and love-struck Alfie own up to their feelings for each other. But something comes between them - a condom, or rather lack of a condom. Poor Alfie is sent off to find something for the weekend after Kat flaps over his lack of protection.

What a pity Vicky Fowler wasn't careful. Now she's thinking about having a termination, which won't please Sharon, who can't have children herself. Sounds like a useful piece of blackmail for Vicky to use to ensure she stays in Walford (although I'd much rather she went back to the States). She could take Barry the pain in the bum with her. Egged on by scheming Janine, he finally makes a decision over whether to fight Pat in court over father Roy's will.

Louise Appleton may be in court soon if her little secret spreads any further in Emmerdale (ITV1). You may recall her battering her stalker boyfriend over the head while most of us were enjoying Christmas dinner. She appeared to have got away with it, but now foolishly tells Diane the gory truth. Diane is liable to use a loudhailer to spread the gossip around the village. Flat cap Jack has an emergency when daughter Victoria is rushed to hospital with appendicitis. Jack thinks she's crying wolf yet again, and it's left to son Robert to call the ambulance. Expect Jack to go on a massive guilt trip. The further away the better.

Published: 19/06/2003