AT last the tide could be turning. Mothers might actually have a choice. In the post-war years, it was working mothers who were the devil incarnate, responsible for all the ills of society. As a latch key child myself, I was aware that many of my friends' mothers looked at me pityingly. They were deeply disapproving of my mother working full time, and were merely biding their time, arms folded over their pinnies, waiting for me to go completely off the rails when they would be proved right and could have a good gloat.

Sorry to disappoint them.

Instead, the pendulum swung completely the other way. And suddenly it was working mothers who were the heroines of our time, and stay-at-home mothers who were lazy, self indulgent parasites.

Ho hum. A mother's place is in the wrong - that's all we can be sure about. But now two remarkable things have happened. Straws in the wind perhaps, but maybe more.

Former Labour cabinet minister Stephen Byers is arguing for more maternity pay. He says that too many women are being driven back to work sooner than they would like because they can't afford to stay at home, so he wants to give them an extra £50 a week for their six months maternity leave.

Meanwhile a number of top companies - including BT, Barclays, Ford and parts of the civil service - are offering mothers five year career breaks. The idea is that you can go home and have your children, but at the same time, keep in touch with the company with regular meetings courses and updates, and then be sure of a job when you want it.

Actually, probably not that many women will take advantage of the five year break. And, possibly, the extra £50 a week might not make too much difference to too many women,.

But what both plans do is make the idea of staying at home with our babies for a few years socially acceptable. God help us, what does it say about our society that in recent years, mothers have been made to feel guilty for looking after their babies?

But we have to get a balance. In the early months and years, many mothers need their babies as much as their babies need them. A few million years of conditioning is not going to be lightly cast off.

But times HAVE changed, While many of us long to be with our children when they are young, once they've started school, we want our lives back, thank you.

And society too wants something back for all that money it spent on our education. And so it's a matter of getting the balance right - and that balance will probably be different in every family.

Every week there's another survey. One will prove that children of working mothers do best. Next week, there'll be one to say that stay-at-home mothers rear happier children. There are no hard and fast rules. Every mother will work out for herself what's best for her and her baby.

But we might at least be finally getting some real choice in the matter.

Until the next swing in opinion.

NICOLE Kidman's getting paid £2m for appearing in a four minute ad for Chanel. She was chosen, apparently, because "she has a unique standard of elegance". Well, if someone paid me £2m, I reckon I could scrub up quite nicely too.

CONGRATULATIONS to the Monument Mall in Newcastle and the MetroCentre - which are now smoke-free zones, making shopping a lot more pleasant. As a former 60 a day smoker, I never thought I'd say this, but maybe the time is coming when we should ban all smoking in all public places - yes, including bars. To be able to enjoy a drink AND breathe at the same time - what luxury.

MICHAEL Howard (right) has a lot to answer for. Ever since the Tory leader took his two page ad out in The Times, I've had that old Bachelors song going round and round in my brain. You know the one: "I believe for every drop of rain that falls..."

It's driving me mad. Could have been worse, though, I suppose. Could have been an old Cliff Richard number.

YES thank you, terrific New Year - we couldn't get to where we planned and woke to six inches of snow and a power cut. But it was great. Really.

We staggered back from the pub at the end of the road looking like abominable snowmen. No need to bother with ice for the champagne - just scoop snow off the back doorstep.

Our neighbours let off fireworks, which we admired through a blizzard. And by the time we were up on New Year's Day, another neighbour had built an enormous jolly snowman on the green and kids were hurtling happily down the sledging field.

We've had a number of snowy New Years' Eves over the years. This, like those others, will be wonderfully memorable.

PARENTS spend almost £2,400 on their baby in its first year, says research by Mothercare. Whatever happened to hand-me-downs and cots, prams and pushchairs being passed round by friends and family. As long as it's warm, clean and fed, a new baby couldn't care less whether its cot is brand new or has been used by 20 babies before it.

£2,400? No wonder new mothers have had to go rushing back to work.

GOOD luck charms don't work, say researchers at the University of Herefordshire. But carrying a lucky rabbit's foot CAN make you feel more confident. But not, presumably, if you're the rabbit.

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