TV review

Dragons Alive (BBC1)

THEY have sharp teeth, extraordinary senses and very smart survival strategies. Sounds like a few TV executives I know, but the narrator of this new wildlife series was talking about reptiles.

These "living cousins of the dinosaurs" fall into four groups - lizards, snakes, crocodiles and tortoises and turtles.

Apologies for sounding like a David Attenborough lecture but the programme did bombard us with facts and figures. The narration refused to call a snake simply a snake. No, snakes were "slinky", crocodiles were "cunning" and Komodo dragons "swaggered".

There was an awful lot of sex and violence considering the programme went out before the watershed. Not that you could tell the giant tortoises were mating. You'd see more movement in a mortuary. The makers had to speed up the film to make it more interesting.

Death featured as the reptiles hunted for food, ripping apart zebras, buffalo and rabbits. Their food habits were as nasty to watch as Jill's dinner party in the blissfully bad taste Nighty Night on BBC2. Cath declared that she didn't eat meat. "Don't worry," said Jill, "it's mostly gristle".

Unlike Cath, the alligator snapping turtle will eat anything it can gets its jaws around. Leatherback turtles ("the gentle giants of the reptile world grow as big as a double bed") had better watch what they eat or they'll have no future.

They like jellyfish but can't tell the difference between those creatures and an indigestible plastic bag. Scientists predict such turtles might be heading for extinction in the next ten years.

We learnt what puts a smile on a crocodile's face - herds gathering for their annual migration across the river. The problem is that this fast food is too fast. The wildebeest move as one through the water, a mass studded with horns and hooves that presents a real threat of crocodiles being trampled underfoot.

But crocodiles are clever. Of all reptiles, their brain is most like ours. They've even developed a method of dividing up the carcass of the animal they've killed. This involves one croc holding the body, while the other's spinning action "carves" up the corpse. They don't leave much on their plate either, consuming bone, skin and hooves.

As you'd expect from a BBC wildlife series, there was some remarkable photography of these animal happenings. The hatching of baby turtles was particularly spectacular. Nine weeks after mum has buried her eggs on the beach, they hatch and the babies tunnel upwards through the hard-packed sand. Their digging is synchronised so they all surface together.

Then it's a quick dash for the sea together, in the hope that stragglers won't get picked off for food by other creatures.

Homage To Catalonia, West Yorkshire Playhouse, Leeds

TRANSLATING books for the stage is always tricky. Remain too faithful and adaptations get bogged down in plot and words, while more free-wheeling versions lose the flavour of the original.

This international collaboration uniting theatre companies in Leeds, Newcastle, Paris and Barcelona opts to give an impressionistic, almost surreal, interpretation of George Orwell's account of a time of turmoil in Europe.

As befits its European origins, this vivid mix of words, film and songs is performed by a cast of British (from Northern Stage Ensemble) and Catalan actors in several languages.

A straightforward narrative is abandoned in favour of a series of striking scenes and tableaux against a giant screen showing documentary film footage of the time.

Director Josep Galindo opts for an anything goes approach on Neil Murray's design that employs books, boots, beds, uniforms and even oranges to symbolise events as Orwell observes the changes taking place in Spain as the setting switches from the war front to a chandelier-bedecked dinner party degenerating into chaos.

As I haven't read the book, I can't say how well this adaptation (by Pablo Ley and Allan Baker) reflects Orwell's work. As a piece of theatre, it's as exciting, energetic and unusual as anything you're likely to see for many a year.

West Yorkshire Playhouse until April 3 (tickets 0113 213 7700) and Newcastle Playhouse from April 22 to May 8 (tickets 0191 230 5151).

Steve Pratt

A Happy Medium, Billingham Forum Theatre

SU POLLARD transforms from a dippy housewife to a manic medium in this very silly, but well received, comedy.

It's one year to the day since Ellen (Sue Pollard) lost her sister Betty and the family decide to hold a sance to fulfil her deathbed wish. After lots of rather naff special effects - flashing lights and spinning picture frames - they finally reach "the other side" - but rather than make contact with Betty, a host of other spirits arrive to stir up trouble. Then all the family's real ghosts start tumbling out of the cupboard... Who is mystery ice cream man? What secrets are Ellen and Auntie Audrey hiding? What surprise messages from the grave are still buried in the house?

The plot and script of A Happy Medium are a little mediocre. The jokes are well worn and the ending seems to come from nowhere. Despite the huge family revelations no one seems very concerned. But the audience loves Su, who was applauded the moment she stepped on stage. She played the same character she almost always plays and they weren't disappointed. Hilarious facial expressions, manic body language and a confused, almost hysterical personality turned her into a very funny, menopausal Mystic Meg character. This, plus her surprise musical number, brought more than a few laughs to the crowd.

Runs until Saturday. Box Office: (01642) 552663

Michelle Hedger