Society may be more tolerant of sdame sex releationships, but there is still a lot of prejudice. Women's Editor Christen Pears talks to a lesbian couple who were forced out of their home.

LIKE anyone who's just moved house, Michelle and Katie are full of plans. They're laying a new floor in the living room at the weekend and they've just ordered some curtains. When I arrive, the talk is all about kitchen units.

But the excitement is tinged with trepidation. The couple were forced to move out of their previous home on the outskirts of Durham City after a year of harassment. They had windows smashed and the words 'lesbo scum' daubed across their garage door. They're hoping the move will put all that behind them.

Sitting across the table from me, sipping coffee, they both seem a little nervous. "We're in a difficult position," says Michelle, fiddling with her coffee mug. "We don't want to be in the same situation where we live now but we do want to tell people what happened to us because no-one deserves that."

The couple met two years ago while working at a call centre and moved in together shortly afterwards. A few months later, they started having problems when a box of eggs was smashed on their doorstep. At first, it seemed innocuous, but it was just the first in a long line of incidents.

Bricks were thrown through their windows, the gate pulled off its hinges and dog dirt smeared over the walls. For three months, they were subjected to a string of late-night phone calls when the caller would hang up. They became so frustrated, they went ex-directory.

"We went to the police a couple of times after it first started but there wasn't really anything they could do. They said they had to catch them in the act. We had a pretty good idea who it was but we just couldn't prove it," says Katie.

The couple are fairly certain they were being plagued by a group of teenagers from the estate where they lived. "There were always a lot of smirks and clever quips when we saw them," says Michelle.

"It was probably a bit of a laugh for them, just something to do, but it ended up making us miserable. We said at the start we would just put up with it and they would eventually stop but it didn't.

"You would come home from work and you wouldn't know what they would have done next. We were never really frightened by it but it was constant and it did start to really get to us. It's not nice knowing there are people out there who hate you that much, especially when we weren't doing anything to them."

It eventually proved too much to ignore and when someone scratched Katie's new car all the way down one side, they decided it was time to leave. Moving house may seem a little dramatic but the women thought about it very carefully.

"It was quite sad in a way because there were people that we got on with really well and that was our home but we knew that we were always going to have problems. It's sad that just a few people can make your life so miserable. Part of me didn't want to give in but it just wasn't worth the hassle," Katie explains.

The couple are fairly unassuming and low key, not what they describe as "dungaree dykes". At 42, Michelle is the older of the two. Dressed in a navy blue suit, her blonde hair cut into a neat bob, she's on her way to work after our interview. Katie, who's 28, is wearing jeans and a paint-spattered T-shirt. She plans to spend the day painting the skirting boards.

"We're just like any other couple. We do coupley things but a lot of people don't understand that. They think we must be different in some way," she says.

When the pair met, Katie was actually in a relationship with a man, although she had been plagued by doubts about her sexuality since her teens.

"I think I had always know that I wasn't the same as other people. I did have a relationship with a woman when I was 20 but that didn't last because I think I wanted to be what people think is 'normal'. I started going out with men. I shouldn't have done it because it's like living a lie but you do worry what other people will think."

She only came out to friends and family after meeting Michelle and admits some of them have had problems with it.

"Even people I've known since school struggle with it. They somehow think that because I'm a lesbian I'm going to fancy them, which is ridiculous. People are frightened by it because they're ignorant," she says, rolling her eyes and sighing.

Michelle, who moved to the North-East from her native Scotland six years ago, says she has encountered more prejudice in this region than anywhere else, something she attributes to the prevailing "macho culture".

"No matter what people say, it's still a real man's world here, isn't it?"

Both women enjoy spending time in London, where they have friends and where they say society seems to be more accepting. They feel they can be more open about their sexuality in the capital and aren't as worried about what people think.

"If you tell someone you're a lesbian up here, you get funny looks. Down there, it's just run of the mill," says Katie.

They both believe their problems stem from a lack of understanding, and they're convinced gay women are perceived differently from gay men. Both think society is more willing to accept same-sex couples if they're men.

"I don't know why that is but it's an historical thing. Gay men seem to be more up front about their relationships and there are a lot of high-profile gay men who are willing to go out on a limb. When you think of gay women, who have you got? Ellen de Generes, Sophie Ward. I think we've got a lot of catching up to do," says Michelle.

She would like to see more done to recognise same-sex couples in law, something she believes is fundamental to changing perceptions. In May, Massachusetts joined the Netherlands, Belgium and three Canadian provinces as the only places in the world where gay couples can marry. Hundreds of couples queued for hours to officially tie the knot.

In Britain, the Government has published a White Paper on civil partnerships, which have a separate legal status to marriage, but it has no plans to offer civil marriage to same-sex couples.

"Over here you don't get recognition as a couple even if you've been living together for years. Because it's same-sex, it doesn't count and that gives people the wrong message," says Michelle.

"We love each other just the same as a straight couple and we're committed to each other. Why should we be treated any differently? We're women, for God's sake, not bloody aliens."

* The names in this article have been changed.