Santa's been far from tough on badly behaved children of late. It's time he put them in their place.

THE trouble with Father Christmas is that he's gone soft in his old age - all twinkly-eyed and sentimental and much too much of that ho ho ho.

Last week psychiatrists said that we should let our children believe in Father Christmas because he is a symbol of hope and joy.

Otherwise known as a soft touch...

The best reason for encouraging children to believe in Father Christmas was that, for December at least, it was such a handy tool of bribery. You know... "If you're not good/don't stop whingeing/don't eat up your greens/tidy your room, then Father Christmas won't come..."

What use is that now? Everyone knows that these days Santa is an indulgent old fool who hardly ever refuses a request. However long the list and shallow the parents' pockets, the lists go on and on until children's bedrooms resemble Hamley's on sale day.

Santa's little helpers are absolutely whacked after chasing round for the latest must-have, the credit cards are melting and the Christmas spirit in pretty short supply. But if parents can't say "no", then you'd think Father Christmas would.

He used to, of course. Before the days when Father Christmas had been re-invented by Coca Cola (honestly), he was made of much sterner stuff. Kindly, certainly... generous, of course... but also a tough old bird. Taller, leaner, less eager to please.

And sometimes you didn't get what you wanted, but what you deserved.

Now that's a thought to send a shiver down the spine, is it not?

And that was the great excitement of the old-style Father Christmas because you were never quite sure...

A few years ago some friends who were, I think, of Dutch origin, decided the time had come to bring back the old Santa. In their house, the children put shoes out on St Nicholas's Day, December 6, and Santa Claus would leave sweets and small toys, before the Big One on Christmas Day

Fed up of their ten-year-old son's vile behaviour, they decided to teach him a lesson. When he rushed down to see what Santa Claus had left him, instead of the piles of sweets and toys his sisters received, he had only a shoe full of pebbles and clothes pegs. Bitter and grievous disappointment.

He was old enough to know perfectly well that it was his parents' doing, but it worked. He still felt he'd been judged by Santa and had failed.

From December 6 until Christmas his behaviour was exemplary and by then he'd sort of got into the habit of behaving better and was never quite so vile as before.

The old-style Santa might not have been quite as jolly - but he certainly knew how to work magic.

OK, the casual loutishness of the young is immensely irritating. The way groups of youths spread themselves across the pavement, continuing their conversations, their burger eating, their swearing, while you veer out of the way. Shrieking girls intent on mobile phone conversations just stride straight ahead, expecting everyone to clear their path. Which we do.

But that, at least, is an unthinking, sort of rudeness.

Unlike the old man who literally pushed me out of the way in the greengrocer's queue this week and the chap, well into his seventies I guess, who made a sudden sprint and grabbed the last M&S trolley almost as my hand was on it - and then turned and grinned triumphantly. And like the old man (complete with cap, what a surprise)) who carried on driving forward into the last remaining parking space when it was clear that someone else was backing into it. She, in the end, gave up and drove out again, with such amazing good grace that I nearly ran after her to say so.

Judging on this year's Christmas shopping trips, the young are still angels of courtesy compared to some old men.

But when it comes to complaining about bad manners, three guesses as to who grumbles the most...

SO nurses are going to be allowed to do simple surgery. Fine, great. Let nurses expand their talents and capabilities and careers.

But while the nurses are stitching up patients, who will be doing the nursing?

Nursing is an honourable and respected profession. But until we've got wards overflowing with too many nurses with nothing to do, then maybe we can leave the surgery to the surgeons and give more patients the skilled nursing they need.

THE highest achieving A Level student is a Vietnamese boy who came to England in 2002.

The winner of the BBC's Hard Spell was 13-year-old Gayathri Panikker, who spoke only broken English when she came to Britain eight years ago.

They have worked hard and studied enthusiastically and loved what they are doing.

Meanwhile, Durham University research has shown that nine-year-olds in Sunderland get higher praise for lower achievements than their contemporaries in Russia and America.

We are more easily satisfied with less. Meanwhile, the UK is gradually sliding down the world education league tables, particularly in maths.

Are we surprised?

Published: 08/12/2004