Going to the chapel - alone

There were no helicopters flying overhead, obscene deals with glossy magazines or fights over official photographs when comedians Meera Syal and Sanjeev Bhaskar tied the knot.

Like a breath of fresh air the couple (who you will know from BBC2's Kumar family) proved that if you want to get married away from the limelight you can.

Meera and Sanjeev may not be Posh and Becks but I am sure they could have raised a fair amount of money by agreeing to smile exclusively for Hello or OK.

Instead they decided to hold a perfectly lovely but very private register office ceremony for just 20 guests.

There dignified wedding made me wonder why do famous people feel the need to sell the rights to their big day as if it was a Hollywood film?

Whether they discreetly release a single 'official' photo like Brad and Jen or create a media circus like Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta Jones, there seems to be a real need to involve the public in what should be a private affair.

Mrs Douglas even had the cheek to take a glossy mag to court after it scooped her chosen rag to print her wedding pictures (note to the former Welsh lovely - if you play with fire ....).

As Catherine discovered if you do sell your big day then you have to make sure that no other media do a spoiler - that means banning your guests from taking photos and making sure no-one can sneak a peak into your day - pretty stressful when you also have to look your best, not fluff your lines and most importantly remember why you are doing it all.

Those in the know would argue that there would be a media scrum with or without the stars' encouragement so they may as well control it and make a quick buck.

But there is flaw in this argument - the public and press only clamour to find out the details of weddings that they already know about it.

If no details are released then no-one can get excited apart from the happy couple and their loved ones - look at the what Britney achieved with her surprise Las Vegas nuptials.

Details may be leaked by florists or caterers but famous people manage to employ discreet staff 365 days of the year - why can't they use the same tactics when employing people to organise their wedding?

Zoe Ball and Norman Cook may have won our hearts by agreeing to pose for photos with the waiting paparazzi outside the church but how did the snappers know to be there in the first place?

It would help if famous people who wanted privacy didn't invite the world and their dog to watch them tie the knot.

If you don't want everyone to know what you are up to then only tell your trusted relations and friends - anyone who doesn't love you will surely use their invitation as a ticket to a small fortune.

Of course not all famous people want to hide their lights - some stars love letting us into their worlds.

Jordan and Peter Andre are talking about televising their big day so we can all shed a tear when the unlikely Barbie and Ken-look-alikes become one.

But then Jordan has never complained about press intrusion or asked a photographer not to point a lens in her face (or any other part of her anatomy).

After so many brash, unromantic celebrity bashes it seemed perfect when a spokesman for Meera Syal confirmed that she had got married. The actress didn't make an announcement until she was asked if she had done the deed and you could almost see the grin on her face when the beautifully succinct statement was released.

It said: ''Following inquiries, Sanjeev and Meera are happy to confirm that they married last week at a very quiet family-only ceremony.''

The actress, writer and playwright, then gave an interview and said: ''We are quite a private couple and just wanted a small family affair. ''We have not even talked about a honeymoon yet, we have just been too busy.''

It may not be as showy as a 16 page colour supplement and an army of bouncers but in this case actions do speak louder than words and prove that at the end of the day all you really need is love and some loyal friends.