"The whole idea that red wine keeps us healthy comes from something called the French Paradox.

Scientists noticed that despite a diet loaded with saturated fat, very few French people actually croak it from heart attacks.

Just 83 out of 100,000 Frenchmen die from heart disease compared with 230 in the US. The difference? The amount of red wine they drink."

OK, this I found on Mr. Google just now. There's been an uproar here over how much wine middle aged women drink. Why? Are we the ones committing all the crimes? A resounding "NO" is the reply to that one. (Please pass the wine.) The news lately has been full of how many "units" you should drink a day/week before you're considered a raging alcoholic. Teenagers are still stabbing people in parks and doing all sorts of nasty evil things but no one seems to care. The government would rather worry about how much women drink during the week.

Murderers and embezzlers are given community service, but the government would rather worry about how much I personally drink. Fine. I drank yesterday and after a very long wait today, I drank more ,at a pub in a social setting, with other people. I have no women friends here to speak of, and I tend to hang out with JB and his very MALE friends. What do we do? We go to the pub and have a few drinks...as you do. Am I a raging alcoholic? I don't think so. (Please pass the wine.) Have I killed anyone yet? No. Have I embezzled money from a friend or employer? No. So...leave me alone already! Even teenage binge drinking has taken a backseat in the news in the past two weeks to wine/beer consumption by middle aged women.

On behalf of middle aged women everywhere, leave us alone please. Some of us enjoy having a "few" in a social setting.Does that make us/me bad people? If it does, Tough Toenails . (my apologies to the people who are Saints out there, but I actually cleaned that up for publication) Some of us wish to God ,or some deity, that we could walk miles with no pain and exercise,etc...but we can't. Leave us alone and concentrate on the real criminals. The ones who attack firemen and police. Go after the kids who have no respect for anything at all, including property and human life. (Please pass the wine.) I have so few pleasures in life and I ain't (nasty American slang word) giving up my wine just because some bureaucrat says so.

Mr. Laptop is freezing up now and if I lose this entire dissertation, I shall indeed commit a violent crime. (and get away with it no doubt).

Oh Dear. Just when you think it can't get any worse. My husband is currently listening to the Wurzels. Someone please pass the wrist cutting apparatus along with the wine. Ooh ahh ooh arr ay!