Too good to go down? Not in the case of Newcastle United

AS he stood in the bowels of Carrow Road, with his head bowed in dejection, Andros Townsend was asked to account for Newcastle United’s calamitous position in the Premier League table.

“For me, it’s mad we are where we are,” said Townsend, who joined Newcastle in a January move from Spurs. “For me, we’ve got an incredible squad, full of internationals in almost every position. It’s crazy that we’re in the position we’re in.”

It wasn’t quite the clichéd ‘Too good to go down’ line, but it was a variation on a theme. So let’s get one thing straight from the outset. This Newcastle side is not, and never has been, too good to go down. In fact, with seven games of an increasingly catastrophic campaign to go, it will now be a miracle if they survive.

For far too long this season, excuses have been made and groundless optimism supported. Whether it was Steve McClaren with his constant talk of “progress” and “improvement” while results remained disastrous, Lee Charnley with his admission that “relegation was not even being considered” at a fans’ forum in February or a succession of players trotting out meaningless platitudes about “performances not being reflected in points”, there has been a collective failure to accept reality.

Well, here’s the reality of the position Newcastle find themselves in. They are six points adrift of safety with seven games remaining, and the gap is effectively seven once goal difference is taken into account. Yes, they have a game in hand on Norwich, but they have won just six of their 31 matches so far this season. Given that they have failed to beat Sunderland and Norwich in their last two outings, why on earth are they suddenly going to win three or four of the games that remain?

“Other teams have got out of similar situations, so it’s possible,” said Townsend. “We’re definitely not in an impossible position, but we’re running out of chances and we have to do something about that quickly.”

After Saturday, the fear is that the time for redemption is long gone. For all that Newcastle displayed a semblance of spirit as they twice battled back from a goal behind, only to go down to a stoppage-time strike from Martin Olsson, many of the failings that will almost inevitably result in their relegation were on display.

This Newcastle side is a combination of players who are simply not good enough, players who might be good enough in other countries but who are completely ill suited to the Premier League, and players who probably are good enough but who do not show even the slightest inclination to break into a sweat for the good of the team.

It is a toxic combination, and it is made worse by the dreadful decision-making that has left Rafael Benitez presiding over a chronically imbalanced squad. The former Real Madrid boss continues to talk a good game, but you suspect he is already counting down the days until his sabbatical at St James’ Park is over.

He doesn’t even have a left-back for a start. Newcastle have now fielded nine different players in the left-back slot this season, with Vurnon Anita and Moussa Sissoko standing out like square pegs in a round hole as they attempted to plug the gap at the weekend.

Anita was repeatedly exposed as Norwich mounted a series of raids up their right wing, yet the Dutchman could justifiably claim that he should never have been playing in the position in the first place. For all his faults, McClaren pleaded for a new left-back in January, only for his superiors to make a half-hearted attempt to re-sign Jose Enrique or Davide Santon. That was always an accident waiting to happen.

The same could be said of the situation at centre-half, where the £8m purchase of Chancel Mbemba was the only defensive outlay from a total spend of more than £80m since the start of last summer. And this for a side who had the second-worst defensive record in the league last season.

So within the first ten minutes of Saturday’s game, you had the sight of Mbemba and Steven Taylor opting not to even challenge Dieumerci Mbokani for the ball because they were incapable of handling the physically-imposing striker. Mbokani spent the rest of the game running riot, and Newcastle shipped three goals in a game for the ninth time this season.

Things were no better further upfield, where Newcastle’s failings increasingly resemble the faults that resulted in their last relegation in 2009. Georginio Wijnaldum is supposed to be one of the best players in Dutch football, yet he resembles a little boy lost when he pulls on a black-and-white shirt. Whether that is down to a lack of character or an absence of interest is open to debate, but his inability to influence a game is now a chronic failing.

The same can be said of Sissoko, an attacking midfielder who thinks he should be playing in the Champions League, but who has not scored a single goal all season. That he actually looked better when switched to left-back says everything for his ineffectiveness in midfield.

“The results don’t reflect the quality that we’ve got within the squad, if anything it’s the opposite,” said Townsend. “If you look around the dressing room and see the players we’ve got, you wouldn’t then look at the table and believe the position we’re in.” Which is perhaps the most damning indictment of all.

Newcastle’s lack of impetus for the whole of the opening hour stood in marked contrast to the feverish determination of Norwich, who claimed a deserved lead when Timm Klose glanced home Robbie Brady’s free-kick in first-half stoppage time. They would have been ahead earlier had it not been for two fine saves from Karl Darlow, whose enforced promotion to the starting line-up was not an explanation for Newcastle’s defeat.

The 62nd-minute introduction of Aleksandar Mitrovic improved things for the Magpies, with the Serb claiming his first equaliser when he headed home Townsend’s cross nine minutes after coming off the bench.

Norwich scored again three minutes later, with Mbokani cutting in from the left flank before hammering home, but Newcastle looked to have claimed an equaliser with four minutes left when Gary O’Neil handled Ayoze Perez’s shot and Mitrovic converted from the spot.

The final twist came in the second minute of stoppage time, though, with Olsson drilling a loose ball through Townsend’s legs and into the far bottom corner.