THE Northern Echo rightly gives prominence to the trials and tribulations of Darlington Football Club.

I am not amused by silly jibes at Darlington FC’s expense along the lines of “an empty taxi drew up and the Darlo supporters club got out”, but a glance in my crystal ball offers little consolation.

After leading a very long and fruitful life, both the Hartlepool and Darlington managers die and go to heaven on the same day.

St Peter welcomes them at the pearly gates and takes them to their accommodation.

Craig Liddle is led to a pleasant bungalow, small but clean and tidy.

He looks through the window and notices at the top of the hill a magnificent palace decked in blue and white flags. There are statues of Hartlepool FC’s past heroes, heavenly choirs can be heard singing Two Little Boys and Poolie ’til I Die. There are monkeys frolicking on the sumptuous lawns and in the water fountains that cascade everywhere.

Craig is puzzled and asks why he has a modest house while Neale Cooper has a huge palace.

St Peter laughs and replies: “That’s not Neale Cooper’s home.

That’s where God lives.”

Rob Meggs, Hartlepool.