EVERYONE knows turkeys have good reason to dread Christmas, but what about the people who have to cook them? Although many glossy magazines and TV chefs would have us believe that preparing Christmas dinner is a cinch, in reality it can be a huge palaver, even for experienced cooks.

Celebrity chef Gary Rhodes is well aware of what can go wrong. He says: ''We've all found ourselves in that situation on Christmas Day where we suddenly realise that our four-ringed stove and small oven just aren't enough to cope with what we're trying to provide.

''It creates havoc and the kitchen starts to look as if a bomb has hit it. At that moment, all you can think about is getting the food on the table quick enough, but afterwards you go back and think, Oh my God!''

But Christmas doesn't have to be hell for the home cook. With a little thought and preparation, anyone can glide around the kitchen looking unflustered and serene.

The key is to start a few days in advance. On Sunday, compose a shopping list of everything you need and get out there and shop. The last thing you want to be doing is dashing around the shops on Christmas Eve.

If you are using a frozen turkey, calculate exactly how long it will take to defrost; many a Christmas dinner has been ruined because the turkey is still frozen.

From here on, it's all about clever cooking, so to help you ensure a relaxed, stress-free Christmas, Rhodes has come up with a few tips:

CHRISTMAS EVE

Rhodes advises dressing the turkey and preparing all your vegetables the day before. He also recommends keeping it simple with just four vegetables, such as roast potatoes and parsnips, along with greens like cabbage, and one other, such as carrots. ''Chop and peel everything and get it ready to go. They don't need to be immersed in water - only the potatoes need to be kept like that.''

There is no need to stay up all night cooking the turkey, he says. ''For some reason, people often make that big mistake of being up at three in the morning and popping it in the oven. But a four pound chicken takes a maximum of one hour to roast, so if you multiply it by four for a 16lb turkey, it only takes three-and-a-half to four hours to cook.

''We always think it's a minimum of six hours, but that means you're eating leather for lunch - very dry and very awful!''

CHRISTMAS DAY

Starting early is the key. Rhodes says: ''Once you've opened your presents on Christmas morning, get started, and try to persuade the children to dress the table.

''Firstly, get the turkey all stuffed and trussed up, and make the rum sauce for the pudding. Then fully cook the non-roasting, non-green vegetables such as carrots and cauliflower and either refresh them in cold water or allow them to cool naturally.

''Season them to perfection, place them in dishes with a knob of butter and cover in cling film. The green vegetables also need to be cooked to tender but still slightly crisp and dunked in iced water.

''Calculate how long the turkey is going to need, and start roasting so it will be ready about 50 minutes before you are planning to eat. Start steaming the pudding at around 10am, and take it off at around noon. Put it to one side, still sitting above the hot water.''

While you have the time, use it constructively to wash up your pots and pans and keep the kitchen tidy and manageable. Then, 50 minutes before you are due to eat, the cooking starts again.

Rhodes says: ''Take the turkey out of the oven, cover it with cling film, and put it to one side. Because it is such a big bird, it will retain a lot of its heat.''

Then, with your oven freed up, you can start roasting your potatoes, parsnips, sausages and bacon.

''With a bird that size, you probably haven't got a tray big enough to roast it all together. But you can pour off some fat from the turkey and roast them in that for capturing that flavour," says Rhodes.

''I like to cook my sausages and bacon separately. You don't have to spread the turkey flavour everywhere - it is nice to let things have their own identity and let them blend as you eat them together. You can also use this time to make the gravy.''

The countdown has now begun. Twenty minutes before you are due to eat, pop the bird back in the oven to give it a final burst of heat. Then a few minutes before you are due to eat, re-heat the vegetables.

Rhodes says: ''Finish the cabbage with a couple of tablespoons of water and a knob of butter to create a steam, pop it in, put a lid on top, stir a couple of times and it's hot.

''With the other vegetables, microwave them with the cling film on, and pull it off at the last minute.''

Then just as you serve up, put the pudding back on the heat, so it will be piping hot when everybody is ready for dessert. And when it comes to clearing up, put your feet up - you deserve it.

''Get the kids in to help. Whoever did the cooking really should get time out,'' says Rhodes