POOR old Freddy Shepherd. No sooner had he offered the view that football's minnows are mere sprat to be gobbled up by the Premiership sharks than his team were handed an FA Cup trip to an uncharted West London backwater.

Freddy will presumably have an alternative engagement on January 8. The embarrassment would be unbearable if Newcastle lost to a team seven tiers - and 126 places - down the football pyramid.

Still, at least Yeading are in the pyramid, which is why it is folly to compare them with fellow FA Vase winners such as Whickham and Guisborough. Yeading have taken their chance to move up and if they stay top of the Ryman League will be in Nationwide South next season, one step from the Conference.

Nationwide North includes Worcester, Redditch and Nuneaton, with the nearest thing to a North-East team being Harrogate Town. Doubtless there are very sound financial reasons for the region's clubs rejecting the pyramid, but as Lennox Lewis said this week: "What you need in life is an opportunity."

LEWIS was talking about Danny Williams, who tomorrow has the unlikely opportunity to become heavyweight champion of the world, thereby ending a year which began with his surrender of the British and Commonwealth titles to a no-hoper.

Little makes sense in the crazy world of heavyweight boxing, but when Williams was subsequently given the opportunity to provide a well-paid punchbag for Mike Tyson he confounded all expectations by beating the crazed cannibal. And now this.

No-one expects him to beat Vitali Klitschko, who is six inches taller and has an incredible 15-inch reach advantage. But no-one expected Cassius Clay to beat Sonny Liston. It's an opportunity which has apparently focused Williams' mind like never before and if he loses it won't be for the want of trying.

WHAT with all this one-day nonsense, it's easy to forget that England will be spoilt for choice in their batting line-up for the Test series in South Africa. Thorpe, Strauss, Butcher and Key are fighting for three middle order places with Collingwood as second reserve. And they've sent Ian Bell home, not to mention Kevin Pietersen.

I can't say I'm happy about Pietersen breaking into the England set-up. He left South Africa because of the quota system, which has been described as "apartheid in reverse" and likened to the policy which is ruining Zimbabwe cricket.

The official line in South Africa is that teams are now selected on merit, but Clive Rice, one of the country's leading cricket figures of the last 30 years, says this is "absolute bullshit".

He believes the system is heavily biased against whites, which is why South Africa are slipping down the rankings. It will be a shame if he's proved right as this should be a very competitive series, of which there are far too few in world cricket.

If Rice is right, it would help to explain why so many South Africans - rugby players as well - are keen to play in England. County cricket clubs can sign as many as they like because of South Africa's trade agreement with the European Union, and since Leicestershire broke the agreement not to go down that route the trickle has been turning into a torrent.

After signing former Zimbabwe Test player Travis Friend, Derbyshire will be able to field a side in which skipper Luke Sutton is the only Englishman, so what was the point of giving them grant money to build an indoor school?

IF anyone wants to know what to buy me for Christmas I'll have a copy of Steve Black's autobiography, entitled Blackie. His main role in life is currently as fitness coach to Newcastle Falcons, but he could equally claim to be the man who is keeping Jonny Wilkinson sane during his absence from the playing field.

They definitely threw away the mould when Blackie was born. His column in the Falcons' programme is always totally off-the-wall. He'll probably do me for breach of copyright, but his latest offering involved horoscopes, and under Libra he wrote: "If you get the time this week change your name to Bert Grimsdale. For a while the Post Office will treat you differently. Go with the flow (that's a direction, not Andy Capp's wife)."

Not many match programmes come up with such profound wisdom.

LIFE sometimes seems too full of cruel coincidences. Last week I lamented the passing of Harry Smurthwaite, who in 1990 presented me with the Banks Village Trophy after Aldbrough-St-John had beaten East Rainton in the final at Bishop Auckland.

One of our opening batsmen that day was Ralph Wilson. Like Harry, Ralph played on long after most have hung up their whites, only for his overall innings to be cut sadly short. He died of cancer the day after Harry at the same age of 68.

Ralph, a farmer and no mean batsman, was the perfect epitome of all that is glorious about village cricket, playing for Aldbrough for almost 40 years.

Ring him during haytime and he would say: "I can play if it's raining." Team-mates come and go, but some you never forget.