It's been resolved now so I won't name the shop in question, but I've had an interesting customer services experience over the weekend.

In the run-up to Christmas, attracted by a pre-Christmas sale, I bought a pair of shoes in Darlington in a shop where I'm a regular customer.

They're hardly a month old and both shoes have cracked across the soles (see picture) to the extent that they're letting in water. On Saturday, on the way to a Burns Night event in Kielder Forest, I called into the shop to (a) buy a dress shirt for the date with the haggis and (b) to suggest there must be a fault with the shoes. I explained I could provide a bank statement proving the transaction.

The fella in the shop told me that he'd once had a pair of shoes that had quickly cracked across the soles and it was because he'd been doing a lot of bending on his haunches. He even demonstrated the kind of bend he was talking about. It was reminiscent of a weight-lifter preparing for a clean-and-jerk.

"Well, I haven't been doing a lot of bending on my haunches," I told him. "I work on a newspaper - there's not much call for bending on your haunches. I just walk around."

Thinking about it, the only time I find myself bending down is when I'm over budget on my costs and I have to pray for forgiveness in front of the managing director. It takes me ages to get up again because I have dodgy knees.

Anyway, I was told that I'd need to send my complaint to head office, so that's what I did. I emailed customer services, together with photographs of the cracked shoes.

To be fair, I've had a phone call from the shop's manager this morning, apologising for the shoes not being exchanged on Saturday and telling me a new pair are waiting for me behind the till.

The phone call was quickly followed by an email of apology from customer services, letting me know that they've taken up the issue with the staff "at our Lancaster store" who hadn't followed company procedures.

I have no idea what the staff in the Lancaster store have done to deserve a rollicking but they must be very confused.

I had to wear my cracked shoes for the Burns Night bash. It was very wet in Kielder Forest so my socks got a bit soggy on the walk down from our chalet. To be honest, it did nothing for my dancing technique. I had to be careful not to bend or twist.