Film Review: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 3D (12A)

THE adventures of turtle brothers Donatello, Leonardo, Michelangelo and Raphael began life in the mid-1980s as an irreverent comic book and rapidly spawned an animated TV series, a trilogy of films and a dizzying array of merchandise.

Turtle power has endured to the present day, so it’s no surprise then that Jonathan Liebesman, director of Wrath Of The Titans, has resurrected the heroes for the big screen.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is an outlandish, action-heavy romp that remains faithful to earlier incarnations, condensing the characters’ back-story into a snazzy comic book-style opening sequence.

Die-hard fans will enjoy the heavy whiff of nostalgia, but if Liebesman was hoping to indoctrinate a new generation, he has cowabungled it. His film is incredibly violent, albeit bloodless, reducing two very young boys in my screening to distressed screams.

The lack of spilt blood is preposterous, especially when the turtles face chief villain Shredder, who sports armour festooned with blades. Razor sharp projectiles scythe through the air but miraculously don’t nick flesh.

The turtles are rendered through motion-capture performances and look rather creepy, but they somersault to perfection in action set pieces including a tumble down a snow-laden mountainside.

Alas, the hefty budget hasn’t stretched to remedying basic continuity errors like when Fox’s plastic heroine emerges from a downpour with dry, flowing hair. Believe that, and you’ll lap up this bland turtle soup.