January 2: Devoted dad Lindz Mason raises money for an operation for his son by dressing as an elf every day.

The Northern Echo:

Echo: Your very good elf
BBC: With a little elf from my friends 

January 3: Villagers in Spain maintain tradition by going into battle with flour and eggs.

Echo: Battered into submission
BBC: Flour to the people

January 4: Secret the sheepdog goes sledging in America.

Echo: Freeze a collie good fellow
BBC: Every dog has its sleigh

January 5: Scottish footballer Stelios Demitriou is hit by a bar of chocolate – so he eats it.

Echo: Oh, he’s bit the bar
BBC: I am the linesman with a Bounty

January 8: Peg the duck gets a prosthetic leg after her foot was nibbled off by a turtle

Echo: Walking quack to happiness
BBC: Walk this drake

January 9: Golf nut proposes to girlfriend on course in Alabama

Echo: My fairway lady
BBC: The Brider Cup 

January 10: Woman places newspaper advert to try to woo a “sexy conductor” on her train

Echo: Ticketywoo 
BBC: Woo the locomotion

The Northern Echo:

January 11: Appeal to find a cat with a distinctive “moustache” a new home in Queensland.

Echo: Furr-cule purr-ot
BBC: The best a miaow can get 

January 12: Knitted literary figures descend on RSPB Saltholme for the Yarn Bomb Story Weekend.

Echo: Wooly Wonka
BBC: Ripping Yarns

January 15: Man in Minnesota proposes to girlfriend by carving a giant “Marry Me” in the snow.

Echo: Ain’t snowbody, loves me better
BBC: Slushy 

January 16: Woman in Northern Ireland marries the ghost of a pirate.

Echo: Dead over heels in love 
BBC: Dead-ringer for love 

January 17: Newly-weds in Carrickfergus embark on a marathon straight after exchanging vows.

Echo: Runnymoon 
BBC: Marry-thon 

January 18: Thieves steal quad bike but are foiled by Durham cops who follow tracks in the snow.

Echo: Snow-where to hide 
BBC: The Flying Quad 

January 19: Man in Glasgow sells buckets of snow for £1.

Echo: Slush fund
BBC:  There's snow business like snow business

January 22: Mally Barnes, of Cockfield, reinvents himself as The Chimney Sweep Poet.

Echo: Read ‘em and sweep 
BBC: I’m gonna brush that soot right out of your flue 

The Northern Echo:

January 23: London mum builds a business with cakes that are replicas of family pets.

Echo: The Great British Bark-off 
BBC: One meringue and his dog 

January 24: Jack Reynolds still loves abseiling at the age of 105 and says his intrepid lifestyle is due to a daily glass of whisky.

Echo: Whisky business 
BBC: One for the rope

January 25: The annual cheese-rolling event in Stilton, Cambridgeshire, is cancelled due to lack of interest.

Echo: Couldn’t give Edam
BBC: Can’t brie bothered

January 26: A newspaper in Texas publishes an obituary to a pet chicken.

Echo: Gone but not forgot-hen
BBC: Laid to rest

January 29: Newly-weds have photos taken in front of volcano.
Echo: Falling in lava ‘gain
BBC: Magma, he’s making eyes at me

January 30: Women tour New Zealand busking dressed as rabbits
Echo: You know I’ll beg, steal or burrow
BBC: Buskers hoppyday

January 31: Cow is filmed sliding uncontrollably down icy road in China
Echo: Ice little moooover
BBC: Torveal and Dean

February 1: Man in New Hampshire turns hobby into global business by making hand-crafted boomerangs
Echo: Many happy returns
BBC: Boom-time

February 2: Norwegian flight with 84 plumbers on board lands early because toilets don’t work.
Echo: Up, up and a wee
BBC: Incontinent-al flight

February 5: A pig rescued from a slaughter-house in Cape Town becomes an acclaimed artist.

Echo: Porktrait artist
BBC: Piggy Banksy

February 6: Woman in Scotland spots a toothpaste stain in the form of David Bowie in her bathroom

Echo: A lad in stain
BBC: Colgate young dudes

February 7: Woman in New Zealand has world’s largest collection of ear-rings

Echo: Ear, there and everywhere
BBC: I’m looking for an ear-hole

February 8:  Armed police in Scotland respond to sightings of a tiger at a farm, but discover a stuffed toy.

Echo: Mistaken Identikitty
BBC: The lie of the tiger

February 9: Thomas the goose dies and is buried to his lifetime love, Henry the black swan.

Echo: Nest in peace
BBC: When two becomes swan

February 12: Scientists in Bolivia appeal for a Juliet for Romeo, the last male frog of his species.

Echo: Hop in the name of love
BBC: I was spawn to love you

February 13: Chefs in Birmingham attempt to break the world record for the largest portion of fish and chips.

Echo: Things can only get batter
BBC: Bigger fish to fry

February 14: Woman on the run from police tries to hide by putting a washing basket on her head.

Echo: The long arm of the laundry
BBC: Your under a vest

February 15: Teddy-bear thieves are thwarted in Arizona when a red traffic light blocks their escape.

Echo: Caught ted-handed
BBC: Bungled

February 16: Man arrested in New Zealand for drink driving a motorised fridge down the motorway.

Echo: Freezy rider
BBC: A fridge too far

February 19: Magician Ian Wragg, from County Durham, retires from kids’ shows due to allergy to rabbits.

Echo: The buck stops here
BBC: It’s not bunny how we don’t work anymore

February 20: Woman on flight to Moscow dries her knickers on the overhead air vent.

Echo: Come dry with me
BBC: Dryin’ pair

February 21: Theives in Adelaide steal a skeleton and escape on a bus.

Echo: Skullduggery
BBC: Boney and Clyde

February 22: Library in America is shut down due to infestation of bed bugs.

Echo: The Scratcher In The Rye
BBC: Of mites and men  

February 23: Broken teapot bought for £15 sells for £575,000.

Echo: Rich tea
BBC: From crackpot to jackpot

February 26: Firefighters in Durham rescue trapped pigeon.

Echo: Flying to the res-coo
BBC: Coo only live twice

February 27: Women in Mexico marry trees to protest against illegal felling.

Echo: Get me to the birch on time
BBC: Yew were made for fir me

February 28: Frank Penna, 85, is Britain’s longest serving ice cream man.

Echo: Scooperman
BBC: He’s served hundreds and thousands

March 1: Darlington postman Alistair Beadle braves the snow in his shorts.

Echo: Hard as mails
BBC: First-class male

March 2: World Book Day is cancelled for many schools because of the snow.

Echo: Rupert The Brrrrrrrr
BBC: Nithering Heights

The Northern Echo:

March 5: A New Zealand vet sings to animals to calm them before operations.

Echo: The first cat is the deepest 
BBC: The Ace of Spayeds 

March 6: A man uses a drone to deliver bread to neighbours in Ireland during the big freeze

Echo: Crumb fly with me 
BBC: The Yeast from the East 

March 7: A world record for the most knitted sculptures is broken in Chennai, India

Echo: Let’s stitch together 
BBC: A stitch in time saves Chennai 

March 8: President Putin displays his football skills in the Kremlin ahead of the World Cup

Echo: Putin the boot in 
BBC: The Vlad done good 

March 9: A swimming pool opens exclusively for dogs in Maryland.

Echo: Bark Spitz
BBC: Duncan Goodboy 

March 12: Japanese man breaks world record for spinning the biggest hula-hoop

Echo: Hoop, hoop, hooray
BBC: Super hooper

March 13: Man spends £180k on a Cleethorpes carousel ride – by mistake.

Echo: Taken for a ride
BBC: Only Fools and Horses 

March 14: Dolly, the cloned sheep, was at the centre of a kidnap plot.

Echo: Fleece release me 
BBC: Lolly for Dolly 

March 15: Daredevil breaks his own world human cannonball record in Florida.

Echo: Fuse the Daddy! 
BBC: Legend in his own launch-time 

March 16: Two men steal a drinks vending machine from a building in Oklahoma

Echo: Pops and robbers
BBC: Lemon-aiding and abetting

March 19: Woman in Scotland is first person to keep a pet bee

Echo: Thank you for bee-ing a friend 
BBC: You’ve got a friend in bee 

March 20: Life-sized cow statue stolen from Huntingdonshire

Echo: Hoof-dunnit?
BBC: Beef encounter 

March 21: Man proposes after burying engagement ring in the woods and inviting girlfriend for a walk with a metal detector

Echo: Bride and seek 
BBC: Something burrowed, something blue 

March 22: Burnley goalie Nick pope goes from milkman to the England squad

Echo: Who dairies wins 
BBC: A game of two heiffers 

March 23: Florida schoolboy breaks world record for number of claps in a minute

Echo: You’ve got to hand it to him 
BBC: Clap of honour 

March 26: Oxford and Cambridge stage The Goat Race as an alternative to The Boat Race.

Echo: Ready, steady, goat
BBC: Blue kid on the starting block

March 27: A wedding in Cheshire ends dramatically when an owl, acting as the ring-bearer, attacks the best man and knocks him off his chair.

Echo: Owl you need is love 
BBC: It’s owl about your face 

March 28: A life-sized statue of Donald Trump naked is to be auctioned in Jersey City and is expected to attract bids of $20,000 to $30,000.

Echo: Donald where’s your troosers 
BBC: Fake nudes 

March 29: Northern Echo journalist Peter Barron goes under the guillotine at Darlington Magic Circle’s Easter Show.

Echo: Chop of the bill 
BBC: Headline act 

The Northern Echo:

April 3: Celebrity foot reader Jane Sheehan is coming to Richmond to hold workshops.
Echo: There’s no business like toe business 
BBC: A leg-end in her field 

April 4: Couple marry in supermarket vegetable aisle where they first met.
Echo: Speak now or forever hold your peas 
BBC: When you hear the beep, you could be married on supermarket sweep 

April 5: Man arrested in Texas for attacking a police officer with a bag of crisps.
Echo: Assault and vinegar 
BBC: ‘Ello, ‘ello, ‘ello, Wotsit’s going on ‘ere then? 

April 6: Man knits a sweater for every place he visits around the world.
Echo: Great Wool of China 
BBC: Sweaters from America 

April 9: Pub in London has a drinks menu just for dogs.

Echo: Pedigree rum 
BBC: Every dog has its dray 

April 10: Hungry giraffe breaks a car window trying to steal food at a safari park.

Echo: Zoo’s sorry now? 
BBC: Wind your neck in 

April 11: Clairvoyant calls in the police over an imposter cashing in on her name.

Echo: Con but not forgotten 
BBC: Swizz anybody there? 

April 12: Souvenir plate for the Royal wedding has a photo of Ed Sheeran instead of Prince Harry.

Echo: Orf with his Ed 
BBC: Ginger snaps 

April 13: Artist creates a Royal wedding scene out of nuts.

Echo: We are nut amused 
BBC: Royal nut-ials 

April 16: RAF officer plans to run the London Marathon dressed as a whoopee cushion

Echo: Run like the wind
BBC: Wind beneath my wings

April 17: Research shows women are more likely to fancy men after spicy food

Echo: Stand by your naan
BBC: Madras about the boy

April 18: The Best Loaf in Britain Awards take place

Echo: The winner bakes it all
BBC: Breadwinner

April 19: A man tries to rob a shop armed with a DIY glue gun

Echo: Stick 'em up
BBC: Gluedo

April 20: Sea Lion escapes from aquarium and hides in a cinema

Echo: The Good, The Bad and The Blubbery
BBC: Net, Flippers and Chill

April 23: Man runs London Marathon in a pencil costume.

Echo: Lead from start top finish
BBC: Hoping to draw a big crowd

April 24: Man in a T-Rex suit proposes to his girlfriend during the London Marathon.

Echo: A sight for dinosaur eyes 
BBC: Raptor round my finger 

April 25: Cinema in New Zealand bans movie-goers coming in their pyjamas.

Echo: Nightie of the living dead 
BBC: Nightwear on Elm Street 

April 26: Bride & groom ask guests to take allergy pills to avoid sneezing during the ceremony.

Echo: Can’t help falling in love with you
BBC: Can’t help falling in love with atchoo! 

April 27: Lorry spills 100,000 ducks eggs on road in China

Echo: Take the next eggs-it 
BBC: You’re yolking 

April 30: Football fan in Turkey hires crane to watch match after stadium ban.
Echo: Keeping up with the play 
BBC: Cherry-picked the best seat 

May 1: Record participation is expected in Naked World Gardening Day.
Echo: The Full Monty Don 
BBC: Privets on parade 

May 2: Ex-Rangers footballer Lee McCulloch reveals his dog stole his dentures.
Echo: Gum on you blues 
BBC: Four, four tooth 

May 3: Robbers in Los Angeles use a woman in tight shorts to distract a security guard.
Echo: Thighway robbery
BBC: Fatal distraction 

May 4: Bride in China throws her bouquet and brings the ceiling crashing down.
Echo: You’ve lost that that loving ceiling 
BBC: What a feeling, when you’re damaging the ceiling

May 7: Darlington identical triplets playing in girls football team have hair done differently so coach can tell them apart.

Echo: Hair we go, hair we go, hair we go
BBC: Curl it like Beckham 

May 8: Paris art gallery opens its doors to nudists.

Echo: Vincent Pants Off 
BBC: Botty-celli 

May 9: Animal charity produces version of “Here Comes The Bride” performed by a pets choir to mark the Royal Wedding

Echo: Meghan Barkle 
BBC: Reigning cats and dogs 

May 10: A dog interrupts a television weather forecast in New Hampshire.

Echo: It never rains but it paws
BBC: Hurricanine

May 13: Woman is given criminal behaviour order for “singing like a drowned cat”.
Echo: Miaowt of tune 
BBC: Smiaowth criminal 

May 14: Amateur baker makes life-size cakes of Prince Harry and Meghan
Echo: Baking ‘em Palace 
BBC: Tiers of a crown 

May 15: Scientists in Australia discover that sharks like music
Echo: Baby I’m jaws 
BBC: You’re going to need a bigger note 

May 16: Woman is sacked for lacing chocolate brownies with laxative at work
Echo: Out on her diarrhoea 
BBC: With friends like that, who needs enemas?

May 17: Litter-pickers in Melsonby stumble across 400 stolen golf balls.
Echo: Nicked Faldo 
BBC: Jose Maria Loss-a-ball 

May 21: Night watchman in Argentina films “ghost” haunting football stadium.

Echo: Ghoul of the month 
BBC: Buenos Scaries 

May 22: Police in Ohio track down robbers due to distinctive bird droppings on their getaway car.

Echo: Dropped in it from a great height
BBC: Dropped in it from a great heist 

May 23: Death café opens in Bangkok, where customers can eat and drink while lying in a coffin.

Echo: Scone but not forgotten 
BBC: One foot in the gravy 

May 24: Man divorces woman because she has seven cats – remarries her even though she now has 40.

Echo: Back fur good (Take Cat) 
BBC: Catrimony

May 25: Lorry driver falls asleep and spills 18 million chicken feathers on highway near Seattle.

Echo: Down on his pluck 
BBC: Get your chicks on Route 66

June 4: Off-duty FBI man goes dancing at Denver nightclub and accidentally shoots man when he does a back flip.

Echo: Boogie gun-derland 
BBC:  Bang ‘em style 

June 5: Venezuelan man enters the Guinness Book of World Records with size 26 feet.

Echo: The Greatest Shoeman
BBC: The sweet smell of sock-sess 

June 6: Butterwick Hospice makes dream come true for patient by arranging a meeting with a tarantula.

Echo: Crawl you need is love 
BBC: The spider who loved me 

June 7: Achilles the Russian psychic cat picks world cup results by choosing food bearing national flags.

Echo: They think it’s all over – it is miaow 
BBC: Win, lose or paw 

June 8: Man proposes to girlfriend in crocodile-infested cove in Australia

Echo: Crocodile done deal  
BBC: Going to the snapel 

June 11: Young doctor Gareth Rogers donates skeleton to his old school in Darlington.

Echo: Skull’s out for ever! 
BBC: Anatomy to you 

June 12: Man is dumped by girlfriend because he’s haunted following an exorcism.

Echo: The Ex-orcist 
BBC: Ghost bust-ups 

June 13: Armed robbers steal 31,000 Panini football stickers in Argentina

Echo: Stick em up! 
BBC: Escape to stick-tory 

June 14: North Yorkshire man James Bartram has the UK’s highest haircut on top of Ben Nevis

Echo: On chop of the world 
BBC: Top of the crops 

June 15: Little boy in Nova Scotia phones police on the emergency number to complain about his mum giving him salad for tea.

Echo: Lettuce bean ‘avin’ you 
BBC: Coleslaw and order 

June 18: A Star Wars-themed café opens in Darlington.

Echo: May the forks be with you 
BBC: Scran Solo 

June 19: Portable toilets are blown into the sky in Colorado.

Echo: Up, up and a weeeeeee 
BBC: Windaloo 

June 20: A church has to be shut after blue tits nest in the pulpit.

Echo: My tweet Lord 
BBC: Nest in peace 

June 21: A Mum sells a wartime shell on Ebay not realising its live.

Echo: More bang for your buck 
BBC: Going, going, bomb 

June 22: Man converts car into fish tank for his koi carp.

Echo: Baby you can drive my carp 
BBC: Carp share

June 25: Brides can walk down the aisle with bouquets made of pizza.

Echo: I pepperoni have eyes for you 
BBC: Truly, madly deep-pan 

June 26: Train driver comes across naked photo-shoot on picturesque line in Yorkshire Dales.

Echo: Hot and steamy 
BBC: Full frontal steam ahead 

June 27: Rat scoffs a load of money after crawling into an ATM bank machine in India.

Echo: Vermin the money 
BBC:  Vermin the money (BBC claimed they had it first) 

June 28: Disc jockey presents his radio show in bandages after being attacked by an owl.

Echo: Peck of the pops 
BBC: I’m a celebrity, get my hoot of here 

June 29: A taxi service is launched in Finland where customers pay by singing.

Echo: Fool if you think it’s Uber
BBC:  Do you know where you're going to?

July 2: Rare Harry Potter book with spelling mistakes sells for £56,000.

Echo: Spell cheque 
BBC: A Goblet Of Fivers 

July 3: Firefighters rescue man from top of lamp-post in Birmingham.

Echo: To boldly glow 
BBC: Lamp-plight 

July 4: Horses abandoned on a tennis court in Bishop Auckland need new homes.

Echo: Novak Jockey-vic 
BBC: New stalls please 

July 5: Tim Henman trains ball dogs for a veterans’ tennis tournament in London.

Echo: RRRRRuffa Nadal 
BBC: Game set and scratch 

July 6: Veterinary nurse rehydrates dying bee in Lincolnshire.

Echo: Staying a-hive (Bee Gees)
BBC: Let it bee

July 9: Grandma fights off burglar with a back-scratcher.

Echo: To scratch a thief 
BBC: An itch in time saves crime 

July 10: Fan has “Football’s coming home” tattooed on his bum.

Echo: They ink it’s all over 
BBC: Cracking game of two halves

July 11: Guests go wild as England score just as wedding cake is being cut.

Echo: Crumb on England 
BBC: It’s crumbing home 

July 12: A rare sooty tern is spotted on the Farne Islands and is named “Gareth”.

Echo: Gull of the month 
BBC: It wasn’t our tern 

July 13: Butter Bear does a sky-diver in aid of Butterwick Hospice

Echo: Bear-devil
BBC: Bear Force One

The Northern Echo:

July 16: Donkey taking part in charity pantomime horse race at Catterick crashes into the rails.

Echo: The Grand Crashional 
BBC: That didn’t last furlong 

July 17: Houston company advertises for an intern to test beds.

Echo: Snooze lie-in is it anyway? 
BBC: REMployment 

July 18: Toe-wrestling championships take place in China.

Echo: Snatching de-feet from the jaws of vic-toe-ry 
BBC:  Toe me, toe you 

July 19: Thieves try to steal petrol from a bus parked in Melbourne but target the wrong tank and steal toilet waste instead.

Echo: Fuelhardy 
BBC: Pooper unleaded 

July 20: Man takes woman on date in Memphis, then steals her car and uses it to take another woman on a date.

Echo: Can you steal the love tonight?
BBC: Walking in Memphis

July 22: Man arrested in Wyoming after leading police on a high-speed chase in a cement mixer.

Echo: Nick and mix 
BBC: Hardened criminal, set in his ways 

July 23: Porkchop, the pet pig, gets married in Chicago.

Echo: Don’t go bacon my heart (I couldn’t if I tried) 
BBC: Pig-sty the knot 

July 24: Dentist in America goes viral with a filmed dance sequence.

Echo: Strictly Gum Dancing 
BBC: Tooth-loose 

July 25: Liam Gallagher has a rant after fan throws fish at him during a concert.

Echo: Don’t look back in angler 
BBC: Go let it trout 

July 26: Judge sentences vandal to clean up the manure of animals at a country fair in Ohio as a punishment.

Echo: Crime and poonishment
BBC: It's a fair plop

July 30: Man in Florida steals ice cream van.

Echo: Freeze! You’re under arrest 
BBC: TWOC ices 

July 31: New Yorker proposes to girlfriend by carving “Will you marry me?” into corn maze.

Echo: Mazey little thing called love 
BBC: Can you field the love tonight? 

August 1: Thieves try to steal shark from San Antoni aquarium by disguising it as a baby in a pushchair.

Echo: Fishin’ impossible 
BBC: The best fin I never had 

August 2: Indonesian couple who cheated on their partners are punished by having raw sewage poured over their heads.

Echo: You can’t slurry love 
BBC: An affair poo remember 

August 3: Police warn of stiff sentences as armed robbers steal $20k worth of wigs in New Delhi.

Echo: There’ll be hell toupee  
BBC: Police are combing the area

August 6: Paranormal investigator claims to have had encounters with the ghost of Elvis.

Echo: The wonder of BOO! 
BBC: Wise man say, only ghouls rush in 

August 7: A man dressed as a combi boiler is West Brom FC’s new mascot

Echo: A whole new boil game 
BBC: Boil in the Baggies 

August 8: House burglars in Indian are scared off by Dumplin’ the pet pig

Echo: Bacon and entering
BBC: They made a pig’s ear of that 

August 9: Thief in Florida is cornered by a herd of cows

Echo: Friesian, you’re udder arrest 
BBC: Hill Street moos 

August 10: Man in China steals five live crabs from seafood restaurant by shoving them down his trousers.

Echo: Taking the claw into his own pants
BBC: Take him to the police crust-station 

August 13: Crows are trained to collect litter at a theme park
Echo: Caw-mmunity service 
BBC: All in a good caws 

August 14: Couple wade through flooded church to get married.
Echo: Nice day for a wet wading 
BBC: My Big Fat Leak Wedding 

August 15: Groom has wedding date tattooed on his ring finger but gets the wrong date.
Echo: Thick as tattoo short planks 
BBC: Ink thickness and in health 

August 16: Rod Stewart sells furniture, including chairs, tables and a fireplace.
Echo: This old hearth of mine 
BBC: The first lot is the cheapest 

August 17: Sculpture of cow sitting on a car is to be driven around as part of the Festival of Thrift.
Echo: It’s Friesian up here 
BBC: Mooter car 

August 20: Mum in Wales regrets buying her kids a hamster after it escapes and chews up her car.

Echo: The rodent to hell 
BBC: Oh gnaw! 

August 21: Hiker in Northern Ireland is injured when a falling sheep lands on him.

Echo: Woolly jumper 
BBC: Tim-baaaa! 

August 22: Drunk man gets lost in Guisborough woods after trying to follow a horse home.

Echo: Show me the neigh to go home 
BBC: Roseberry clopping 

August 23: Scarecrow competition in Hunwick is scandalised because a policeman exhibit keeps having his trousers pulled down.

Echo: You’re knickered 
BBC: Officers particulars taken down 

August 24: Burglar in Middlesbrough is caught after having a cup of tea and leaving his finger-prints on the mug.

Echo: It’s a fair cup, guv
BBC: What a mug 

September 3: Bertie, the world’s fastest tortoise, fathers a son

Echo: Tortoise and the Heir 
BBC: Time to shellebrate 

September 4: Couple have Harry Potter-themed wedding after she is attracted to him because he looks like Ron Weasley

Echo: I do ron ron 
BBC: Getting snitched 

September 5: Blue Cross animal charity appoints Pet Poet Laureate

Echo: Bonio, Bonio, wherefore bark though, Bonio 
BBC: I wandered lonely as a hound 

September 6: Thief raids shoe shop but only steals right shoes

Echo: All things right and bootiful 
BBC: The kicks are alright 

September 7: Police issue photo-fit of man after robbery but forget to include his nose

Echo: God only nose where he’d be without it (8)
BBC: Police have nothing to blow on (2)

September 10: Man arranges with police to pull him over for speeding – then proposes to girlfriend 
BBC: Miami Splice 

September 11: Bungling burglar in Minnesota is arrested when his getaway car gets stuck in a pile of manure

Echo: On the pong side of the law 
BBC: Law and phwoarder 

September 12: Jamie Oliver wrestles burglar to the floor

Echo: Grapple turn-over 
BBC: Breaking and entrée-ing

September 13: Newly-weds hit by huge wave while having wedding photos taken.

Echo: I love you just the way you are 
BBC: Here comes the tide 

September 14: New Yorker wins $10m on a scratchcard after going into shop to buy treats for his dog Boots

Echo: Winalot
BBC: From wags to riches

September 17: Maggie thee dog steals her owner’s dentures in New York.

Echo: Pedigree gum 
BBC: Grinalot 

September 18: Streaker at rugby match in New Zealand is tackled by spectator dressed as Superman.

Echo: Comic strip 
BBC: Up and under-dressed 

September 19: Police called to murder scene in Derbyshire find the victim is an entry in a scarecrow contest.

Echo: The wrong side of the straw 
BBC: W-hay-sting police time 

September 20: World record is set for the fastest motorised toilet near York.

Echo: Loo-is Hamilton 
BBC: As quick as a flush 

September 21: Residents in Florida suburb complain about neighbour gardening nude.

Echo: Chrysanthebums 
BBC: Buttock-cups

October 22: Cruella, the Abysinian hornbill at Kirkleatham Owl Centre, gets a new mate called Elvis.

Echo: Oh let me be, your steady bird 
BBC: You’re the Devill in disguise 

October 23: Race takes place in Buenos Aires to find the world’s fastest waiter.

Echo: Fast orders please
BBC: Trayathlon 

October 24: Harriet, the Galway donkey, becomes a tourist attraction due to her singing ability.

Echo: I want to bray free 
BBC: Ee-aw the one that I want 

October 25: Tommy Tickle, the clown, loses his size 15 comedy shoe in Brighton.

Echo: The shoe must go on! 
BBC: The tears of a clown 

October 26: Suspected burglars reported to be breaking into house in Canada turn out to be cleaners who’ve got the wrong address.

Echo: You do the break-in vac…
BBC: Domestic incident 

October 29: Divers stage an underwater disco.

Echo: Can’t stop til you’re wet enough 
BBC: I haven’t stopped dancing wet 

October 30: Man wins lottery after breaking hip and joining hospital syndicate

Echo: Lucky break 
BBC: The Winner Takes A Fall 

October 31: Whacky coffin company gets an order for a Tardis.

Echo: Dr Who wants to love forever? 
BBC: Exter-cremate 

November 1: Woman claims she’s got engaged to a ghost.

Echo: Why do ghouls fall in love? 
BBC: To all the ghouls I’ve loved before 

November 2: Pining Sidney the swan is reunited with the man who raised him from a chick.

Echo: Waddle I do when you are far away
BBC: You are the swan and only

November 5: Baggage handler falls asleep in cargo hold and flies from Kansas to Chicago.

Echo: Worst-case scen-air-io 
BBC: When the Boeing gets tough 

November 6: Experiment in Switzerland to see if cheese responds well to music.

Echo: Let it brie 
BBC: Sweet dreams are made of cheese – who am I to diss a brie 

November 7: Rocky, the cat, gets his own wheelchair after losing the use of his back legs.

Echo: Paw-wheel drive 
BBC: The Pussycat Rolls 

November 8: The MissBumBum contest in Brazi ends in violence over claims the winner has a fake bottom.

Echo: Bumble in The Jungle 
BBC: Crack on 

November 9: Gigoo, a chicken in Oxfordshire, is left $15m in her owners will.

Echo: Making a fast buk-buk-buk-buk-buk-buk 
BBC: Winner, winner, chicken dinner 

November 12: Diane, the Emu, and Jack, donkey, fall in love.

Echo: Emu were made for me 
BBC: Little ditty about Jack and Diane 

November 13: Five vicars form a rock band.

Echo: Pray-C/DC 
BBC: God gave frock and roll to you 

November 14: Family puts zoo up for sale in New Zealand.

Echo: Doing a roaring trade 
BBC: Ooh-be-doo, I wanna sell my zoo-oo-oo 

November 15: Woman in Texas blows up her wedding dress to celebrate her divorce.

Echo: Bride and boom! 
BBC: Something old, something blew 

November 16: Dog addicted to eating pizza in Mexico is banned from fast food.

Echo: Pup-eroni 
BBC: Stuffed Crufts

November 19: Man in Fred Flinstone costumer arrested for speeding

Echo: There may be rubble ahead 
BBC: Yabba-dabba-done 

November 20: Manchester pub advertises job vacancy for official Christmas menu taster.

Echo: Money for stuffin’ – and your chickens for free 
BBC: Eating trifles 

November 21: Buddy, the labradoodle, finds missing dentures belonging to Mr Barker.

Echo: Pedigree gum 
BBC: Lead investigator 

November 22: Canadian curling team banned from tournament for being drunk.

Echo: I bet they drink Curling Black Label 
BBC: Slip Sliding Affray 

November 23: Couple in Louisiana do a spot of housework and find a $1.8m lottery ticket.

Echo: Hoover the moon 
BBC: Dust the ticket

December 10: Nuns embezzle £500,000 from school in America and spend it on trips to the casino and holidays.

Echo: Sisters are looting it for themselves
BBC: Caught in the Sister Act

December 11: Scottish fish and chip shop offers deep-fried Christmas with all the trimmings.

Echo: We fish you a Merry Chipmas
BBC: You batter watch out, you batter not cry

December 12: A woman who married the ghost of an 18th century pirate reveals they’ve split up.

Echo: D.I.V.OOH.AAARGH.C.E.
BBC: Off the hook

December 13: A ton of chocolate leaks from a factory in Germany and causes road chaos.

Echo: Choccy-blocky-hoo-ha
BBC: Careless Whispa

December 14: Santa Claus dons diving gear to give treats to sharks and fish at Malta National Aquarium.

Echo: Shark the Herald Angels Sing
BBC: Shark the Herald Angels Swim