Wellock's World

Well, no, not quite, minister. His name is Duncan Fletcher and he's from Zimbabwe, and as the man in charge of sport in this country it would be a help if you knew such things.

Richard Caborn also had no idea who is currently captaining the British Lions, and although he's a 22-handicapper himself the only European he could name taking part in the US Open was Colin Montgomerie.

Quite how the spin doctors allowed him the opportunity to display such ignorance is amazing, but it was a massive own goal just as he was trying to deny accusations by his predecessor Kate Hoey that the government is obsessed by football.

Well he would deny it, wouldn't he? Even though it's patently true.

And what does this obsession achieve, other than currying favour with the mass of voters? It certainly doesn't produce rounded people or halt the decline of our yob society.

It may even have contributed to the disgraceful scenes we have witnessed at the one-day cricket internationals recently.

In my travels in pursuit of Durham recently I have stumbled upon several beautiful village grounds - Ashford in Derbyshire, Sheepscombe in Gloucestershire, the "cradle of cricket" at Hambledon in Hampshire.

Imagine the contrast between these tranquil scenes where the game was nurtured and those at Headingley and Trent Bridge.

Much of the mayhem can be attributed to religious fanaticism among the Pakistanis. Trent Bridge bent over backwards to accommodate them by erecting a prayer tent facing Mecca, and were repaid with a barrage of fire crackers.

But there is evidence that Asians still feel unwelcome in our cricket grounds. As far as they are concerned racism is still rife, which will have helped to fuel the backlash.

Warwickshire have teamed up with local authorities to promote a college course called Cricket Without Boundaries with the aim of using the game to integrate ethnic minorities and create opportunities for them.

This sort of thing has more chance of succeeding than the pathetic plastic fencing which was intended to deter pitch invaders. King Canute would have stood a better chance.

ANOTHER question Mr Caborn couldn't answer was to name three jockeys riding at Ascot this week. He couldn't name any, but hopefully by now will be aware of Frankie Dettori.

Having once ridden all seven winners on the card at Ascot and missed last year's event after a plane crash, Dettori has entered the consciousness of those who don't know the front end of a horse from the back.

His three-timer on Wednesday, coupled with his trademark leap from the saddle, put him back in the headlines, although his leap into Willie Carson's arms was a bit over the top.

As a gesture of relief when the stewards ruled in his favour, it surpassed many footballers' goal celebrations. So that, at least, should have caught Caborn's attention.

IN my experience politicians are like editors - when they interfere in sport they show a total lack of feel for it.

The current Northern Echo editor is a notable exception (crawl, crawl) but I remember a night editor who refused to mention Blyth Spartans on the front page when they reached the last 16 of the FA Cup. He then gave a huge display to Mark Cox for reaching the last eight at Wimbledon.

People who have no other interest in sport suddenly come alive at Wimbledon time, and now we must brace ourselves for the annual outbreak of Henmania..

I hope our Tim wins, but I can't see it. In fact, I won't see it because I always make a point of not watching a single ball hit.

IN the end you had to hand it to Retief Goosen. It would have been much simpler to win the US Open by holing a two-foot putt, but it was remarkable that he still had sufficient composure to triumph in an 18-hole play-off.

Most people would have been too traumatised to lift themselves for the ordeal, but Goosen's reaction of "that's golf" suggested he was happy to come back and take whatever the fates threw at him.

The more irascible Colin Montgomerie would not have been quite so philosophical. After two rounds, with Tiger out of the frame, Monty had a chance. In the third he blew it and that elusive first major looks further away then ever.

Perhaps he wants it too badly and would benefit from a few attitude tips from Goosen, who is, after all, an inferior player.

This was one of those majors where the cream did not rise to the top, as with the Open at Carnoustie when Jean Van de Velde went paddling and Paul Lawrie came through to win.

It's good for the game to have someone other than Tiger win, but not if the contenders attempt a recreation of a Marty Feldman sketch on the final green.