The sorry side of buying abroad: Housetrapped In The Sun (C4): APOLOGIES to Channel 4. Only yesterday I complained that Grand Designs Abroad didn't feature enough property disasters. Now along comes this - a whole catalogue of houses sliding down cliffs, being eaten by termites and people robbed of their life savings by dodgy estate agents.

If you wanted to see people suffer, this was the show for you. Brits can't get enough of homes in Europe at the moment but, of course, they want a bargain. TV shows exploiting this leads them to think it's as easy as falling off a log, causing people to leave their brains on the plane and become easy targets for being ripped off.

Sometimes they only have themselves to blame. Leslie Gregory and her daughter Lindsay are among the 8,000 Brits settling in Spain each year. Settle isn't perhaps the right word as their villa was on the move. Heavy rain had washed away the hillside on which the two-bedroom property was nestling, leaving the building perched a few metres away from a 40ft drop.

Their home also had leaks in the ceiling and black mould growing, not the best situation for two women and a baby.

It was their own fault. They couldn't afford to have the place surveyed before they bought it. If they had, the potential for disaster would've been spotted. To cap it all, their insurance only covered damage to the house not the land.

These were valuable lessons to be learnt because not everyone has presenter Amanda Lamb trying to sort out the mess, which she did with the help of Paco the builder and a retaining wall. Her message was clear: do your homework before buying. Have a survey and investigate the likelihood of flood, fire, landslides, earthquakes and avalanches in the region. Even then, things can go wrong. Delia Taylor bought a £100,000 house for her and her nine cats in the Dordogne in France. Unfortunately, there were other occupants - termites, nasty little wood insects that breed at a rate of knots and eat wood. They'd had a good feed on Delia's home, which was falling down around her.

The certificate stating the house was termite-free wasn't worth the paper on which it was written. Now she's on a one-woman crusade in a legal battle against the vendor.

Sometimes the enemy isn't animal, but human. One man spent his life savings of £30,000 on a flat in Cyprus. After he'd moved in, a stranger knocked on the door demanding rent. It emerged that he hadn't bought the property, only rented it. All the official documents were forgeries.

Bad as they were, it's doubtful if these horror stories will stem the flow of Brits moving abroad - or the number of TV shows about people doing it.

Brassed Off, York Theatre Royal

ANYTHING else this season at the Theatre Royal will be hard pushed to be as good as this. It's one of those rare occasions when play, cast and production gel perfectly in a tears-and-laughter evening, complete with brass band music.

Paul Allen's skilful stage adaptation of the hit film asks the question: will the band play on when the colliery closes?

Grimley Colliery faces shutdown in the pit closures of 1994, with the ballot to miners on the redundancy offer coinciding with the band's attempts to win the national championships. Band leader Danny sees no reason why the tradition should be abandoned. Some of the other miners aren't so sure. His son Phil is struggling to make ends meet and keep his family together.

The arrival of sexy flugelhorn player Gloria gives the band an injection of oompah-pah that carries them through to the tear-jerking final at London's Royal Albert Hall.

Richard Foxton's clever set provides the perfect setting with the mine shaft towering over the action. Co-directors Damian Cruden and Richard Twyman neatly orchestrate the action as it switches between harrowing scenes of family life and the inspirational brass band music (featuring, on alternate performances, Shepherd Building Group Brass Band and The Harrogate Band).

Luke Adamson makes a fine guide to events as young Shane, with Andrew Dunn and Andrina Carroll showing the desperation of a couple at their wits' end. Ann Marcuson's Gloria is a woman caught in the middle, working for management but playing with the miners and romanced by Gareth Farr's handy Andy. Throughout it all, Fine Time Fontayne's Danny maintains a stiff back and belief in the music in a finely controlled, understated performance.

Until September 25. Tickets 01904 623568.

Steve Pratt

Published: ??/??/2004