MAD Max Branning is a glutton for punishment.

He just can’t stay away from Tanya, whose past behaviour hasn’t been entirely loving towards him. I mean, burying him alive in a coffin is hardly a sign of affection (unless you are Dracula or a follower of sadomasochistic tendencies).

But no, Max is back after receiving an SOS from Jack to say that Tanya is boozing and the kids are running riot.

Surely that’s their normal behaviour in EastEnders (BBC1).

Nobody ever tips their hat, says “good morning” and hands out fivers to passers-by in Soapland. It’s always wham, bam, thank you ma’m, whether it’s sex or violence or just a shopping trip to the mini-mart. Living life to the Max is Tanya’s aim now that she’s seriously ill.

Her refusal to tell her family about her cancer is driving her to drink (the number 46 is the quickest route). Eventually she relents just as Max is heading orf out of the East End. He and dodgy brother Derek are planning a new business venture in Birmingham, but can daughter Lauren persuade him to stay?

Weddings are on Michelle’s mind in Coronation Street (ITV1). Just one little snag – fiance Ciaran has gambled away the money for the big day. He’s only got enough left for a half of shandy and bag of pork scratchings at the Rovers for the wedding breakfast.

So he borrows the money for the wedding.

Bad idea. Michelle isn’t impressed when she finds out. This is a bit like burying your husband in a coffin. First, the wedding is off. Then Ciaran is off – back to the cruise ships. Then Michelle is off. Back to the cruise ships with Ciaran.

Or is she? We’ll have to wait and sea...

Is Cain able (this is a repeat of some verbal wordplay first broadcast several months ago) to stop the rest of the village lynching him in Emmerdale (ITV1). Everyone is against him. Hardly surprising as he cheats and sleeps and lies all over the place.

His rivalry with Jai Sharma intensifies after Jai’s dad is hurt in a car accident that is clearly Cain’s fault. Emmerdale’s bad lad is determined to stop Jai marrying his old flame Charity-Begins- At-Home. Cain has taken up with Jai’s sister Priya. He gives her a present – ah, what a nice lad – of a piece of jewellery.

There’s a catch, it was stolen from her mother. Well, at least it’s keeping it in the family.