I wandered lonely as a cloud,
Of soot and ash came crashing loud,
Twas time for me to brush your flue,
And leave your chimney good as new.
Across the north I’m known to roam,
Where e’er I go, I write a poem,
I’ll not just free your hearth of grime,
I’ll lift the gloom with sweeping rhyme…

WHEN Mally Barnes was suddenly given the brush off after nearly 30 years in the same job, he found himself in need of a clean start.

Four years on, Mally is having the time of his life after reinventing himself as a chimney sweep. But he’s not just any ordinary chimney sweep. Oh, no. He’s a chimney sweep poet, combining sooty duties with writing comic rhyme about the places he visits.

He’s the Sir John Bitumen, Coalridge, or even Woodyard Kindling of chimney sweeps – and his following is growing by the day.

Mally, who lives at Cockfield, in County Durham, was “devastated” when he was made redundant from his job as a transport manager. “It came out of the blue and I didn’t have a Plan B,” he admits.

But he had a eureka moment when he bought the house next door to rent out and wanted to install a wood-burning stove. “The waiting time for a chimney sweep was up to nine weeks – they were like hen’s teeth,” he says.

Within days, Mally had booked himself on a training course in Seaham with the Guild of Master Sweeps and spent nigh on £10,000 on a van, brushes, rods, a specialist vacuum, and other chimney sweep paraphernalia.

Business was slow to start but it gained momentum when he took to Facebook and started writing poems about the places he’d been on his travels as a sweep.

“I’d always tinkered with poetry and it just seemed to come naturally when I was out and about on jobs – especially when I found myself in places with funny names,” he recalls.

His first poem was about Muggleswick and other quirky North-East locations, like No Place, Burnt Houses, Pity Me, and Philadelphia quickly followed…

You’re going to Philadelphia,” Mrs Sweep said with a sigh,
You’d better put more bait up,” was my rather sharp reply.
It’s a long way to the USA, especially in my gear,
And then she dropped the bombshell, it was only Tyne and Wear.
In future, if you book me, to let you know the score,
When mentioning Philadelphia, please state it’s DH4!

“They were such enchanting names and they really inspired me. I loved writing the poems and the customers seemed to love them too,” he says.

With the support of partner Suzanne and daughter Danielle, confidence boomed and so did business – with an ever-growing archive of poetry.

Now, a new revenue stream is emerging with brides-to-be booking Mally as a lucky sweep for their weddings. He comes in old-fashioned sweep’s costume and gives them a lump of coal, a lucky gift, and a personalised poem – a case of For better or verse.

Before long, he’ll also be making an entrance on two wheels because he’s just been given a vintage bike. All it needs is a new front wheel and the reinvention as a traditional chimney sweep will be complete.

Having initially traded as The Durham Sweep, Mally’s now in demand from Northumberland to the Yorkshire Dales and across into Cumbria. With an increasing UK trend towards wood-burners, chimney sweeps are enjoying a resurgence and Mally’s sweeping all before him.

“It’s just snowballed and I honestly think the poetry has made a huge difference because it makes me unique,” he says. “It’s all word of mouth – people know they’ll get a professional, value for money job, but there’s a bit of fun comes with it too.”

Suzanne, a nurse at Darlington Memorial Hospital, says he’s never been happier. “When he was a transport manager, he was stuck inside all day. Now he’s out and about with a smile on his face – it’s the best thing he’s ever done.”

Meanwhile, Mally sums it up by saying: “I love meeting people and I love writing poems so I reckon I’ve struck it lucky.”

Hard as it may have been at the time, sweeping changes have clearly been the making of Mally Barnes, Chimney Sweep Poet Extraordinaire.