Will Roberts
As a child I always missed out on the crazes. When I got my first shell suit people were into Kickers. I finally got a Gameboy when people had moved on to Playstations. So I’m over the moon to be finally up to date by having my own blog.
Spice Girls in Need... of a big pullover
Hurray! The 90s pop bands are back! I always had a soft spot for Take That, and as a teenager growing up when the Spice Girls were in their prime, I couldn't help but have a favourite. (I was a Posh fan initially, before progressing on to Baby).
Oh, and then there's rumours that Boyzone might be reuniting, which I couldn't really give a toss about. They were rubbish, now they'll just be rubbish and old.
It's only right then, that the Spice Girls get to record the official anthem for this year's Children in Need campaign. I mean, they seemed to do it every year during their first incarnation.
The title of this year's song grabbed me, it's called Headlines'. At last, I thought, song which will accurately convey the complex dynamic of the newsroom at a busy local newspaper. What the music world has been missing in my opinion is a journalism-based ballad.
Failing that, I was hoping for some subtle comment on the extensive media glare which the five girls have faced since their Wannabe days. Ok, perhaps that was asking too much too as well.
So I decided to watch the video to reunite myself with Geri and co.
Perhaps I'm growing old. Perhaps I'm becoming too conservative, but after thirty seconds or so of the video I had to remind myself that this was for Children in Need. Family entertainment it was not.
For those who haven't seen it, I'll explain. The video starts well; the group strutting into a dimly lit room to strike a pose.
One of those wind machines plays with Baby's hair as she kicks off the vocals. A chandelier. Sporty is looking pensive. Do you get the picture?
About 51 seconds in (yes, I timed it), is when it takes a sharp turn up Flesh Avenue.
Ginger Spice, who was always the naughty one, suddenly appears in a remarkable bra and elbow-length gloves combo. Where did that come from? She wasn't wearing that two shots ago. Why has she got a six-pack?
By the second chorus they're all joining in. Scary Spice is rolling around on a fur rug wearing an ill-fitting wonderbra. We're getting a lot of thigh.
Then Posh appears in what I can only presume is a dodgy stockings and suspender set from the market which has been taped to her skin with electrical insulation tape.
Kids will love this video. Especially the male type aged between 15 and 75.
I'm glad your back together girls, but it's not a great song. I think it will sell well though, especially if Daddy has any say in it.
10:34am Friday 16th November 2007
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