THE tragic story of 14-year-old Joseph Lister, who died on a school caving trip in Nidderdale, North Yorkshire, last week, felt dangerously close to home.

One of the highlights of this summer for two of my sons was an evening spent underground exploring the same network of caves. Another, the same age as Joseph, is looking forward to his school trip there in the spring.

Of course, we had some misgivings when the ten and 12-year-old first begged us to let them enter the dank, black labyrinth of caves with a few friends on an expedition run by the same outdoor pursuits organisation involved in this week's fateful school trip.

But then, if I'm honest, I have misgivings every time they go out on their bikes, climb trees, go to the shops or play rugby. As a parent, I can see the world is full of danger. But, on the whole, I keep this to myself.

Since it's neither realistic nor healthy to keep our precious children locked up indoors day and night, the best we can do is stifle most of our anxieties and let them, within reason, get on with things.

I knew the Bewerley Park centre had an excellent reputation, with highly qualified and experienced instructors and all safety equipment provided. They take thousands of schoolchildren caving every year in expeditions that, thankfully, never make the news because everything goes to plan.

We were warned the caves could fill up with water in wet conditions, but this was unlikely, we were told on the day our boys went.

Fearless as ever, and kitted out in waterproof overalls with safety helmets, torches and spare battery packs, they couldn't wait to get beneath the surface, to explore this hidden world of spectacular stalactites, stalagmites and fascinating rock formations.

Several hours later, they emerged into the daylight, muddy and soaking, their blackened faces beaming with joy and exhilaration. On the way home in the car, they talked about how they had clambered down mud slopes, crawled on their hands and knees through narrow tunnels and waded through water up to their knees. "It was awesome...brilliant" they said. "Can we do it again?"

My thoughts were with the grieving parents of 14-year-old Joseph Lister this week who, sadly, never got the chance to enjoy such a conversation with their son.

Obviously, the investigation into Joseph's death, after water levels rose unexpectedly, is yet to be completed and further trips will no doubt only be undertaken once the education authority is satisfied over safety issues.

But soon we could be facing the dilemma of whether to let our 14-year-old set off on the same expedition. He knows about the tragic accident, but is desperately keen to go caving with his friends.

I know it would be an enriching experience, a thrilling adventure enlivening academic subjects like geography and geology as well as teaching him about teamwork and managing risk. Most of all, of course, it would be fun.

But as parents what will be uppermost in our minds is the fact that another 14-year-old set out one day last week with the same hopes and expectations as our son. And now he is dead.

Safety is paramount. But I remind myself that the biggest risk I took with the younger boys on the day of their caving expedition was when I put them in the car to drive to the caves and again for the half hour journey home. We all take risks like this with our children every day.

I expect we will let our 14-year-old go. And we'll cheerfully wave him off, telling him to have a lovely time, too, even if, inside, we are churning up with fear and anxiety.

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