POINTY hats, teetotalism and football. Mike Amos looks back at the life of Albert Franks.

Albert Franks, stalwart Newcastle United centre half and the first Englishman to play for Glasgow Rangers, has died. He was 81.

For 22 years he was also a Co Durham police officer – mostly as a greatly successful detective, what the courts called a thief taker – winning 13 commendations.

“I maybe could have become a sergeant but I didn’t want to wear a pointy hat,” he once said.

The column featured him back in 2008, Albert recalling how he’d broken up a training ground punch-up between the formidable Jimmy Scoular and the equally combative Bob Stokoe by the simple expedient of sitting on Mr Scoular until he agreed upon the error of his ways.

Albert declined to reveal the exact wording of their conversation, save that it wasn’t exactly “Forgive me, father” but contained a fair few f-words, nonetheless.

He was born into a Methodist family at Boldon Colliery, even having to seek his mother’s permission to sign for Newcastle on a Sunday, and remained a lifelong teetotaller.

“I smelled beer once and it was disgusting. I certainly didn’t want it in my mouth,” he said.

Captain of the RAF football team while on National Service (“we even played in Spandau prison, where they’d kept Hess”), he was known for his physical strength and the length of his throw-ins, scored four goals in 75 matches and played in the same team as Milburn, Mitchell, Eastham and White. Albert reckoned himself the worst amongst them.

Rangers paid £6,500 at a time when manager Scott Symon was rebuilding. Albert insisted that the only time he had real trouble with the natives was at training after England’s 9-3 Wembley win over the Scots. “All I did was keep on telling them that I wouldn’t mention the match,” he recalled.

He made just three appearances. “Symon went out and signed Jim Baxter,” recalls Matt Vallance, who wrote Albert’s obit for the Glasgow Herald. “After that Albert was toast.”

He had loan spells at Morton and Queen of the South, joined Lincoln City, became player/manager at Scarborough in the Midland League but rejoined Durham Constabulary after failing to agree terms for a similar post at Bradford City.

Also a capable cricketer, he once hit a 25-minute century – two sixes, 16 fours – for Boldon Colliery at Wheatley Hill.

Albert lived at Vigo, near Birtley. His funeral is at St John’s church, Birtley, at 11 15am today.

So we exchange a few reminiscences with Matt Vallance, the Scottish football journalist particularly recalling a third round FA Cup tie at Newcastle in January 1968 in which Allan Ross, his cousin, kept goal for Carlisle.

United had last lost at home almost a year earlier, the 56,569 crowd confident that the run could be stretched despite Tommy Murray’s early goal for the visitors.

That it proved the winner was chiefly down to Ross, still the Cumbrians’ all-time appearance maker. That he even saved Olly Burton’s late penalty may chiefly have been because he’d done his homework. That the match programme carried a photograph of Burton shooting to the keeper’s right possibly helped, too.

Celebrations overflowed. At 3am next morning, Ross – with Murray as his passenger – was stopped by the police for driving the wrong way down a one-way street in Carlisle.

“The cops immediately put Allan in the back seat and drove Tommy home before dropping Allan back at his house,” says Matt.

It wouldn’t happen today, he adds.

Shildon cannabis farm

We’ve been away for a week. Left minding the shop, Martin Birtle reports that the paper carried a substantial story on the discovery of a cannabis farm in Shildon. “At least the town still has one growth industry,” he adds.

Homeward from holiday, we detour via Peterborough Cathedral for Charlotte Osborn’s ordination as a Church of England deacon. Charlotte was lay chaplain at Newcastle Airport; Leo, her husband, served for seven unpaid years as Northern League chaplain and is a former president of the Methodist Conference.

Holders of a gilded invitation card, we’re guided by stewards to seats near the front, only to be asked a few minutes later to make way for those more worthy.

Those who know their Bible may recall the parable of the wedding feast, in which a humble guest is bidden “Go thou higher”.

This is the opposite: “Go thou lower.” Leo, it may be recalled, was the North-East’s most high profile Aston Villa fan. He is accustomed to such relegation.

Feversham Cricket League

Tomorrow marks the annual pilgrimage to the Feversham Cricket League, High Farndale v Spout House this time, though news from that wondrous part of North Yorkshire isn’t good. Reduced to just three sides, the league has already lost five games this season because clubs were unable to raise a team. An emergency meeting tonight may decide its future. Much more, of course, next week.

….and finally

The four British boxers to have fought Muhammad Ali (Backtrack, June 15) are Henry Cooper (twice), dear old Brian London, Joe Bugner, also twice, and Richard Dunn.

Wimbledon almost upon us, readers are today invited to suggest how the term “love” entered tennis parlance.

Naught for your comfort, the column returns next week.