WHILE clearing out boxes of paperwork under my older boys’ beds, I came across an intriguing item, headed ‘101 Things I Love About You’, sent to one of my sons from his girlfriend many years ago.

Of course, it was personal and certainly none of my business. Son and girlfriend, still together after all this time, would have been horrified to think I had stumbled across it.

The right and proper thing to do would have been to fold it back up, put it in the ‘to keep’ box and think no more about it. But I couldn’t resist glancing at the first few things on the list.They were there, directly in front of my eyes, practically jumping off the page, right at me.

I had reached number 58 when 18-year-old Roscoe came into the room: “What are you looking so shifty about?” he demanded.

Eventually, I confessed what I’d done: “I couldn’t resist, Roscoe.”

He grassed me up immediately, going onto our WhatsApp group family messaging phone chat to tell them all what I’d been up to. The son and girlfriend were horrified.

“Put that down now,” came the message from the son who owned the piece of paper in question. “I don’t think I have ever been this embarrassed,” messaged the girlfriend who had sent it. “Hope there’s nothing rude on there,” she added. I assured her there wasn’t and that it would go no further.

The other boys demanded I ‘spill the beans’ at once. I didn’t. And I warned them I’d be going through all their stuff next. The WhatsApp group family chat went eerily silent.

In my defence, I have been asking the three older boys, who have all left home, to sort through their belongings, so that I could have a clear-out, for about two years.

The three of them used to share the large bedroom. Now I’ve got rid of all the single beds and 14-year-old Albert, who will be left home alone once Roscoe heads to university in September, is commandeering it all for himself.

He deserves some compensation for being the last one, living with us in what, he complains, will soon feel like an old people’s home. He wants it painted black, with a staircase leading up to a cool attic den, along with a slide coming back down into his bedroom.

I’m not sure about that. But he is getting a double bed, all to himself, which his older brothers only ever dreamed of. And a sofa bed so he can have friends to stay in his huge, airy room with plenty of space for his clothes, books, music and sports paraphernalia.

With the bed and sofa arriving in a few days’ time, the older boys are still showing little interest in getting involved: “You’ve left me no option, but to go through all your stuff myself,” I protested after they accused me of snooping.

Son number one tells me I should chuck everything out, but how can I do that when there are all sorts of sentimental items like photographs and mementoes, along with important documents, such as exam certificates, left lying around?

Son number two wants me to keep everything. But he’s held onto all his football medals and trophies going back as far as primary school, along with match reports he’s mentioned in, programmes from premiership games he’s been to, tickets to gigs and events he’s attended, mementoes from days out, cards, notes and letters from friends and award certificates from school.

“I’m not planning to open a museum,” I tell him.

I’ve discarded or sent to the charity shop those items that are obviously not needed. The rest, I’ve put in a ‘holding area’ (Patrick’s current bedroom). I sent them a photograph.

“But where am I going to sleep when I come home?” wailed Patrick, whose bed has disappeared under a pile of paperwork, clothes and files. I assured him it was still under there somewhere, just waiting to be excavated.

In the meantime, I tell them, if they are short of ideas of what to get me for Mothers’ Day, I have never received a list of ‘Things I Love About You’ from anyone. I’d be happy with just a couple.

One of the boys is probably more likely to send me a list of ‘101 Things I Don’t Love About You’, starting with ‘Reading my personal mail’. And I don’t blame him. I still feel a little guilty.

But his girlfriend did take some of the heat off me when she revealed that my son had sent her a ‘101 Things I Love About You’ list first, which her mum and sister also discovered in her room – and they read it too.

Honestly, what would you have done?