I HAVEN’T got a lot of time but I need a newspaper.

When you get to the shop counter there are a couple of elderly ladies, one of whom is buying most of the shop when she suddenly realises that she has to pay for her stuff.

So it’s down to the bottom of the shopping bag and eventually the purse is fished out.

Then there appears to be an unfamiliarity with currency as several coins are extracted, examined closely and replaced until she has one she likes the look of - a note is also produced, replaced and a smaller value note substituted.

“Oh can I also have...” and an aged finger points to something behind the counter.

The item is scanned and added, the total altered and another coin is teased out of the purse which had already been plunged back to the dark recesses of the shopping bag.

The transaction complete, the counter is still unavailable whilst the purchases, gathering dust on the counter, are eventually rammed into the bag.

The seasons begin to change outside and clutching my paper and a sandwich I wanted, I hope that the second lady hasn’t much to buy. Wrong.

She seems to want to pay for her newspaper deliveries back to 1943 but informs the shop assistant that sometime in the summer of 1952 she didn’t get a copy of Woman’s Own and is unwilling to pay for it.

A haggle develops. The day drags on and the sell by date of my sandwich approaches.

I just wanted some advice from our knowledgeable HAS readers as to what circumstances a strangling would be a perfectly legal option?

Chris Greenwell, Darlington.