IT'S still one of football’s great mysteries: just how did West Auckland’s pitch come so suddenly and dramatically to flood during a crucial Amateur Cup match on a wild Wednesday afternoon in March 1963?

With just nine minutes remaining, West surprisingly trailing 3-2 to Blackpool Rangers, water from a swollen beck cascaded through a boundary wall and across the pitch, causing the game’s immediate abandonment.

More than 50 years later, there are still plenty of West Auckland lads who swear they know who dammed the waterway or who, after a few beers in the Workmen’s, might themselves claim to have been the diluvian hero of the hour. West won the replayed game 5-1.

Now, however, there’s a previously unaired theory – one which highly respected Durham FA member and local football administrator John Priestley insists holds water.

Memory stirred by the recent story of the school bus stuck in floods near Easingwold, John recalls a similar incident involving an Eden bus at Bluebell Corner, near Newton Aycliffe.

Youngest of the Eden crew sent from West Auckland to rescue it, John was charged with wading through the water to attach the tow hook to the bus.

Back at the garage, the foreman reported that the inspection pits were filling with water because a large tree branch was damming the nearby stream.

“Because I was already soaked, I was charged with fastening the tow hook to the branch. The stream was already at flood level and when the branch was removed became a torrent, flooding the nearby football ground. That’s the real story of how it happened.”

West Auckland general manager Stewart Alderson, back then just a schoolboy supporter, insists it’s the first time he’s heard that one – but it’s something for a rainy day, isn’t it?

THE Ebac Northern League’s campaign against offensive language may be losing a little in the translation. Though much of what euphemistically is termed “industrial” could be heard at the Christmastime derby between Esh Winning and Tow Law, just one player was cautioned. The wretched gentleman’s offence – and this is horse’s mouth stuff – was to say to the referee: “I bet you were bullied at school.”

At Tuesday evening’s match between Darlington RA and Northallerton, meanwhile, RA had a Syrian refugee on the bench. When he arrived, it’s reported, he couldn’t speak a word of English. Now he knows two. He learned those in the Northern League, an’ all.

DAVE Cook, a fine wicket keeper and a great character, has died aged 68. His brother, three years younger, was Durham director of cricket and former England batsman Geoff Cook, with whom he’d played for Normanby Hall.

“He was almost the complete opposite of Geoff; they loved each other enormously,” says NYSD League president Chris West.

Geoff takes the point. “Dave was a really good sportsman, played football for Middlesbrough Juniors and junior cricket for the Yorkshire sides. I was an artisan by comparison, always second fiddle in the back garden, that’s for sure.

“Dave was gregarious, always the centre of attention, renowned for pushing the rules pretty close when behind the wicket. He was an outstanding player, but perhaps became a victim of the 60s.”

Chris West recalls an additional advantage. “As a wicket keeper he was a very useful aid to his bowlers as his ear-splitting appeal was known to dislodge the bails 22 yards away.”

Dave later played moors cricket for Westerdale, became a school caretaker and retired to the clubhouse at Guisborough. His funeral is at Kirkleatham crematorium, Redcar, at 1 45pm on Tuesday January 10.

A Boxing Day email advises that Andrew Thornton has finally ridden his 1,000th winner – “and wearing glasses,” notes retired bookie Billy Neilson. It prompts a £2 30 investment in the following day’s Racing Post.

No matter that the first six pages are devoted to Thistlecracker – a horse, apparently – the Post gives Thornton a decent ride, too.

Like the column, Billy Neilson remembered the former champion amateur when – sorcerer’s apprentice – he rode out for Arthur Stephenson, known in Stivvie’s Leasingthorne yard as Eddie the Eagle because of his short sightedness. These days they call him Lenzio.

Optically unfettered, the Racing Post guy observed that Thornton’s attempts to leap Frankie Dettori-style from his 1,000th winner, at Wincanton, were frustrated by a badly twisted knee which resulted in his missing the day’s last two rides and needing a few days to recover.

It’ll give him time, says Andrew, to ponder whether 1,000 will be his final hurdle.

….and finally, the column on December 22 sought the identity of the former England cricketer, still playing, who was 41 on Christmas Day. It was, of course, Marcus Trescothick.

Today back to Andrew Thornton, the 24th jumps jockey to ride 1,000 winners. A bit much to name the others but readers are invited to suggest – without consulting – the top three.

Forever trying to keep one jump ahead, the column returns next week.