Geometry lesson

WHEN the monarch dies – unless in one or two of the more obstreperous African nations – the heir is, as it were, apparent. In matters of succession, as in much else – you should see the General Synod – the Church of England does things rather more laboriously.

When a parish priest leaves, there’s a lengthy gap before his successor arrives. It’s called an interregnum, and is even longer than a General Election campaign.

In the parish of Tudhoe Grange, Spennymoor, they’d not had a parish priest since Canon Neville Baker, there for 39 years, retired in 2007.

In the parish of Cassop cum Quarrington, three or four miles to the east, it may have been four or five years. All that ended last Saturday; Father John Livesley arrived. Interregnum ruled no longer. If it may not be said that they’d searched high and low, they’d searched high, anyway.

Thereafter – thereafter! – it becomes a bit complicated. Though it’s now commonplace for a priest to have two or more parishes, it’s much less common for the parishes not to adjoin. Separated by the London to Edinburgh railway line and quite possibly by a chunk of Croxdale St Bartholomew, these two aren’t even in the same deanery, nor archdeaconry, either.

For the new arrival it may prove an interesting variation on the scriptural line that you cannot serve two masters. Thus it was that, at Saturday’s licensing, they went in like Noah’s animals, two-by-two. Two area deans, two archdeacons, two lots of churchwardens two mayors.

Two bishops? Well actually there were three, one retired. That’s when it gets really tricky.

What (among other things) unites the two parishes is their opposition to women priests and, ultimately, to women bishops. They are “high”

church, subscribe to an umbrella group called Forward in Faith, have episcopal oversight from what’s popularly known as a Flying Bishop – in the north Martyn Jarrett, the Bishop of Beverley – but remain ecclesiastically within the Diocese of Durham.

The two area deans are for reasons of geography, the bishops for reasons – shall we say – of geometry. They come at it from different angles.

Whether the man on the streets of Cassop or Quarrington gives a fig, whether he heartily wishes that they’d just get on with being “church”, is a different theorem entirely.

THE licensing is to be at 2pm in Cassop-cum-Quarrington, centred on the church of Christ the King, in Bowburn. Fr Livesley’s first eucharist in his new charge is to be at 4pm at Tudhoe Grange.

The Bishop of Durham will lead the first and preach at the second.

The Bishop of Beverley preaches at the first and leads the second.

Principally for the first reason, geography, women priests are there in support. They are asked to robe separately. “We’re putting clothes on, not taking them off,” whispers a lady curate, indignantly.

That’s how it is. Students of these things could even tell you a priest’s churchmanship by the number of buttons on his cassock, though there’s an even bigger giveaway.

Some of the churchmen are female.

The church is happily heaving, about 250 people and a teddy bear.

Bowburn may not have seen so great a crowd since Crowtrees Club gave away free beer. The old pit banner at the back depicts Big Meeting crowds outside the Royal County Hotel. It’s a bit like that here.

Bowburn’s amazing, likewise its people. The Sixties church had an infamous “pineapple” roof which leaked like a top secret dossier and a “moon rocket” spire which crashed to earth in the wind. The new church, on the same site, was built during the interregnum, principally championed by long-serving churchwardens Maureen Robinson and Margaret White, magnificent in their best hats.

“We never gave up hope of a new priest,” says Maureen. “We prayed hard and were confident of getting one, but thought it would be handy to have a church to put him in when he got here.”

Keith Lumsdon, the area dean of Sedgefield, says at the start that it’s a wonderful day for him because there’ll be no more interregnums. He also says there’ll be two collections, though no need to give to both. “The second’s to catch those at Tudhoe who aren’t here.”

The service is largely what the church calls historic formularies, the new man swearing allegiance to the Queen and to the Bishop of Durham and his successors. The second bit’s important, it’s Dr Tom Wright’s last day on parish duty before returning to the blessed groves of academe.

Bishop Martyn talks of all that’s been achieved in recent years.

There’s also a reference to “numerous strange decisions made by the Church of England across its history”

and a prayer for the Pope.

The two parishes simply rejoice to have a new man in their midst.

JOHN Livesley was a Manchester Cathedral chorister, trained for ordination after taking a history degree, was sent for work experience to a parish in Leeds and fell in love with Naomi, the vicar’s daughter. They married in 2007. The vicar was Father Peter Anderton, formerly at Owton Manor, Hartlepool and now, in retirement, assistant priest of St Mary’s, Horden.

“I thought I might gain a curate and instead gained a son-in-law,”

says Fr Anderton, affably. giving every impression of a man who considers it a good arrangement.

Fr Livesley,who had been a curate at Swinton, near Manchester, spoke of his excitement at coming to County Durham. St Andrew’s, in Tudhoe Grange, is probably even fuller than Bowburn. Among the congregation are Anglican priests who won’t even robe because women priests, whose orders they don’t recognise, are helping celebrate communion.

That’s how it is, too.

“People of this parish, I ask you to welcome your new priest-in-charge,”

says the Bishop of Beverley, after which in the order of service is the word “applause”.

The clapping’s long and hearty.

Audible above it is a whoop. That’s probably the area dean. Anyone who understands how the Church of England acts, or where on earth it’s going, may give themselves a round of applause, too.