FANCY taking someone else’s husband on holiday?

Mariella Frostrup did.

When work commitments meant her husband had to drop out of a family canal holiday at the last minute, she borrowed good friend actor Vince Leigh, boyfriend of her friend, broadcaster Penny Smith and took him instead.

All above board and separate cabins, but she says it was a great success.

Well of course it was. People always behave better with other people than they do with their own families. And their bad habits don’t annoy us so much because we haven’t had to put up with them every day for years.

So why stop at husbands?

Years ago when we used to have the boys’ friends to stay, they were always impeccably behaved, polite, helpful and chatty – to their own parents’ utter disbelief. And when our sons were in other people’s homes we heard similar baffling reports of our own usually bolshy teenagers being utterly charming with strangers and even volunteering to wash up.

But there – I found it so easy to be endlessly patient with the elderly mothers of friends while snapping all too easily at my own.

(Sorry, Mum). So maybe this family swapping business might have something to recommend it. Politer, more restful perhaps.

In the past the nobility always sent their children to be brought up in other households with other families, so it’s not exactly a new idea.

But actually no, I couldn’t.

The great thing about family holidays – the whole point – is that they’re a chance for families to spend time together, get to know each other and create shared experiences and memories, whether it’s glorious foreign sunshine or relentless British rain.

Much of everyday family life is inevitably taken up with “Do this, I said no, Do that, Don’t forget. Have you done? Why haven’t you? Do this now!”

Holidays are different. Nothing to do and all day to do it in. Holidays together are the great cherry on the cake of family life – and I’m not sharing that with anyone else.

MEANWHILE, the wonderful thing about Elton John and partner David Furnish on holiday in St Tropez this week is just now normal they looked – baggy shorts, white legs and a cheerful air of distracted chaos.

That’s because they were with their toddler sons, Elijah and Zachary, and were just like any other dads. Pretty much like prime minister David Cameron in fact.

A three-year-old with a plastic sword and a desire for ice cream is a great leveller.

JUDY Murray on Strictly? Inevitable really. In the last few years Andy Murray’s fierce tennis-coaching mum has had a dusting of glamour and glitz. She’s super fit and elegant, knows about hard work and serious training and doesn’t have an uncompetitive bone in her body.

Of course she’ll dance to victory.

The other competitors might as well concede defeat right now.

AMOTHER in South Carolina was arrested for swearing in front of her children after she shouted at them in a supermarket to “stop squishing the * * * * * * * bread!”

Another customer reported her and she was soon marched off.

Well * * ** !

If they did that here, that would mean half the country behind bars.

Spend any time in a public place and the profanities surround you like swirling litter.

We tried very hard not to swear in front of our children, (Husband more successfully than I.) Now they’re all grown up, they try not to swear in front of us.

A friend of mine called that hypocrisy.

I prefer to think of it as good manners.

SO young adults have taken to gardening in a big way. A recent survey showed that 25-35 year olds are spending a lot of time in their gardens – and prefer it to watching TV or going to the cinema.

Wonderful. A whole new generation of Alan Titchmarshes discovering the wholesome benefits of tending the soil.

But hang on. It’s been a wonderful summer. Spending time in the garden doesn’t necessarily mean digging, planting, taking cuttings or growing things from seed.

More likely it means lying back on a lounger, working on the tan and opening another bottle while waiting for the BBQ to heat up.

Still, it’s a start.

ON the day he got his GCSE results, one of my sons, celebrating enthusiastically, lost his phone, lost his wallet and fell in the river. Somewhere in the chaos, he also met the girl he’s marrying next year, which is what really made the day memorable.

Whatever grades you had, remember, there will always be more important things in life than exam results.