At Your Service
Mothers superior
The column visits a Mother's Day cafe church service to see what youngsters these days say they've learnt from their own mums
HUNGRY for more, or perhaps
simply because someone
has discerned the need
to feed the inner man, we
have been invited for the
second time in a month to what has become
known as a Café Church. It does
much more than just fill a space.
The first occasion was a joint
Methodist/Anglican gathering at North
Cowton, in North Yorkshire. This one,
feet beneath the tables, marks Mothering
Sunday at Barnard Castle
Methodists and has been meticulously
planned by a group of seven students
from Cranmer College in Durham.
The day previously they'd given out
250 little nosegays with an invitation to
attend the service, helped the kids make
some rather splendid clay roses, invited
some of them inside to make Mother's
Day cards.
The clay roses are still on display. I'm
so hungry, I could eat those, too.
Though always hospitable, distinctly
family friendly, the town centre church
has been transformed. Little tables overflow
with flowers and with food, the Reverend
Keith Pearce - Teesdale's minister
- acting as a waiter if not exactly being
mother.
"There are going to be 12 baskets left
over," he says, biblically, and thoughts
turn to loaves and fishes. Do they still
make Mother's Pride?
If not perhaps 5,000, around 80 are present.
While there are many more mums
than young children, there's not a commercial
café in Barney which wouldn't
welcome half as many on a winter Sunday
morning.
On the same table there's a delightful
little two-year-old, all curls and cuteness,
and a lady 90-odd years older who remains
in hat and top-buttoned coat. It's
hard to tell who's enjoying the proceedings
more greatly.
The service is led by Anne Offler, who
attends North Road Methodist church in
Durham and is on a "discernment" place
at Cranmer, with a view to possible ministry.
"It's going to be fun," she says.
Since it's Lent, the big wooden cross
is purple shrouded. A young lad wears a
Sunderland shirt; that seems pretty
penitential, too.
There's a leaflet explaining how Mothering
Sunday began - something to do
with everyone going back to their
"mother" church on the third Sunday in
Lent, especially those poor souls in service
- and on the other side, a quiz with
a motherhood theme.
What famous mother starred in Pretty
Woman? What's the name of Bart
Simpson's mum? Who does the voice for
Fiona's mum in the Shrek films?
How should I know? Wasn't Pretty
Woman a Roy Orbison song? Who the
heck's Shrek? This isn't maternal instinct,
it's some mothers do have 'em.
For the second time in three days, proceedings
start with the song Come On
and Celebrate. The first, the previous
Friday evening, had been at the opening
of the new Methodist church at Witton
Park, near Bishop Auckland, and there'll
be much more of that next week.
One door opens, someone at Barney reports
that the homely little Methodist
chapel up at Lands, near Cockfield -
from which we'd reported a golden-glowing
harvest festival one sunny September
Sunday in 2006 - had closed before
Christmas.
Sunday's is one of the services in
which folk are encouraged to participate,
even to walk about a bit. They're
asked to talk with their neighbours
about what they learned from their
mother.
I'm half way through a third buttered
scone when the question's put by Alison
Richardson, a mother of eight-year-old
twins who lives at Leadgate, near Consett,
and is an ordinand at Cranmer.
The answer about not speaking with
the mouth full seems both honest and
appropriate but sprays crumbs everywhere,
nevertheless.
Others suppose that they'd learned to
wash their neck, to be polite and courteous,
to wrap dad around their little finger,
just like mum did.
Anne says that she can identify four
mother figures in her life - "probably because
just one couldn't have coped".
There's also an exercise in which we're
invited to make a pretty little box from
folded paper, at which the admirable Alison
is hugely adept. "I'm no good at theology,
I have to be good at something,"
she says, self-effacingly.
There are those of us, alas, who are not
only hopeless at such handiwork, who
fail to tick any practical boxes at all, but
who believe origami to be a breed of
antelope.
As if by some minor miracle, the box
also ends up containing a chocolate.
Could it be one she'd made a little earlier?
We've written before that they don't
learn this sort of thing at theological college
and were manifestly mistaken.
They must.
There's a reading, an address cleverly
constructed, some prayers which the
bairns have written. One simply wants
to pray for everyone - "even those who
are bad" - a second for his mum, "because
she's crazy".
A third has a yellow streak. "Lord, you
know I like bananas. Help my mum to
buy them."
It ends after about 70 minutes. As
probably they'd hope of a café church,
it's been a thoroughly refreshing
experience.
8:57am Saturday 8th March 2008
Print 
Email this
Comment
What are these links for?
If you liked this article and would like to share it with others on the web who might be searching for good content we've made it easy for you to do it.
At the bottom of all articles, you'll see links to six sites. These sites - commonly called 'social bookmark' or 'social news' sites - have large communities of web users who share and rate interesting, useful and fun things on the web.
Clicking the links will automatically add the address of the story you are reading to one of these sites, letting you share it with others. Each site will ask you to register to share stories. Registration is free and once a member, you can store, recommend and search for stories that interest you.
More on Digg
More on del.icio.us
More on Furl
More on reddit
More on NowPublic/
More on Yahoo!