With the rise and rise in dementia and an increasingly aged population, there has never been a more important time to understand the effects of such a devastating disease. MP Jenny Chapman recalls her experience coping with dementia in her family and shares her experience of becoming a Dementia Friend

WHETHER it’s your grandparent, mother, father, husband, wife, friend or even child, everyone knows someone with dementia.

Hundreds of people in Darlington now live with dementia. My nana died with dementia in 2008. I remember the slow deterioration of her memory and watching a disturbing, sometimes comedic, retreat in an earlier life. She thought her first grandson, my new-born baby, was her son. Looking back there were signs of dementia years before and I only wish I had known more about the disease at this stage.

I recently organised a training sessions for business and organisations in Darlington to train front-line staff to become Dementia Friends. Devised by Dementia UK, the 45 minute sessions help anyone who works with the public to understand dementia and provides practical tips on how to support those with the disease. We learned memories are destroyed starting with the most recent events until only early life can be recalled. Emotions, we were told, remain stronger for longer. A fun day out will leave a good feeling even when the memory of the day has quickly faded. The easiest way to understand it is to imagine a bookcase full of memories. Sometimes the books at the top of case fall off, but those at the bottom remain steady.

As we all live longer, more and more people will develop dementia. But it’s not an inevitable part of getting older. The likeIihood of developing dementia rises with age but it’s not a given that an older person will develop it. In the UK, over 40,000 people under 65 have dementia. Some will need residential care, but most will be living at home for years before that time comes. It is important that everyone who works with the public improves their understanding of dementia and the small steps we can all make to make everyday tasks easier for those with the disease.

Dementia itself is not a disease – it’s actually caused by lots of different diseases. The word ‘dementia’ is just an umbrella term for the symptoms caused by these diseases such as memory loss, confusion and personality change. Alzheimer’s disease is the most common cause but other dementias include vascular dementia, dementia with Lewy bodies and frontotemporal dementia.

I’ve been struck by the instinctive kindness that some people show. At my hairdressers, Get Smart on Bondgate, it was touching recently to see how staff supported a woman with dementia with kindness and sensitivity. They helped her to find the right money to pay and arranged transport home with warm smiles and no fuss. Staff like that are exceptional, most of us would admit to not being always as patient or mindful as we should.

So often understanding the problem is the first step towards finding a solution. This is true of dementia. Small changes like having pictures of different coins on display at tills, many of our supermarket in Darlington are now doing this, or avoiding the use of dark door mats that can look like black holes to those with dementia, can make all the difference. The way we listen and speak to those with dementia improves with a little more understanding of the disease. Small steps can often make such a difference.

Dementia has a bigger impact on women – with more and more women living well into their 80s, half a million women in the UK are now living with dementia.. The condition is the leading cause of death in women in the UK. Women are also more likely to take on unpaid caring roles for other people with dementia and are more than twice as likely as men to provide intensive, 24-hour care. Many of us have friends or relatives who provide unstinting support to loved ones in this situation.

More research is needed. But first and foremost we need to act now to improve the lives of people with dementia. We all need to learn the steps that can be taken to prevent or slow its advance, but there is no cure. You can help – dementia research desperately needs volunteers. A new service called ‘Join dementia research’ has launched to help people with and without dementia, and you can register your interest in taking part in studies in this area. If you or someone you know might be willing to help, you can sign up online by visiting joindementiaresearch.nihr.ac.uk

In the meantime, Dementia Friends training is free. It only takes 45 minutes and make a real difference to the way we think about the disease. Few of us know there are over 100 different types of dementia, that it doesn’t affect only older people, that it can progress at vastly different speeds or that with the right support, it’s possible for people to live independently, happily and safely for years.

I would like Darlington to become a truly dementia friendly town. Anyone with dementia or caring for someone with dementia should feel confident about travelling on our buses, using our libraries, shops and public buildings. With a small time commitment from enough of us, and the help of Dementia UK, we can become a town where understanding dementia is part of everyday life. I met with residents in Cockerton last week and chatted to them about the training and they were overwhelmingly positive, and we are planning a session early in the New Year. Please join me. Dementia doesn’t discriminate – dementia is a condition that can affect anyone regardless of background, education, lifestyle or status.